Jealous of time spent with others when we have so little.

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
My GF and I have been dating for over 15 months, in fact for the past year we have been living together. My mother had died when we first met and she along with her parents took pity on my situation allowing me to share a house with them in which she and I share a room and bed. We are both young she being 18 and I am 19. She is highly motivated an mature, she plans for the future with determination as do I. We have had our share of petty arguments and problems that we have been able to work through, however since we both work and go to school our time together is very short and usually rather impersonal. The thing is, is that when we got together we both had friends that were dragging us down, because of this and lack of time we cut off all of our dead end friendships and concentrated on work and each other. Time has passed, with leizure time rare and she works with one of these old friends of her's. She has become more cordial and interactive with this girl who we once both saw as a threat and because of this in addition to our lack of time together I am becoming extremely stressed and unheatly jealous at the slightest interaction that they have. We had some difficulties recently that we worked through but I really dont want this jealousy that she is somewhat unaware of to destroy our happiness. I know that I should take a breath and relax for I know that my GF is 100% loyal and loving but none-the-less I feel the threat of losing more time with her as well as another person taking an important role in her life. The cold sting of jealousy is mercilessly stabbing at my heart. Please advise me so that I may release myself from these demons. Advice
You are right, jealousies are real demons.

Your suggestion about taking a deep breath is a very good one. I recommend telling yourself "GET OVER IT." Keep saying that and the feelings may at least become less painful.

It is good that you trust her. That is one usual problem that jealousy can grow on. But you are still worried despite your trust. Count yourself lucky that you trust her and that it isn't a guy she is spending time with. Imagine how jealous you would feel then.

Fight against the jealousy and try to get more time together with your GF.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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