He admits to me that he flirts with other girls
Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
My boyfriend of 7years has changed alot over the last 12 months. He made new friends as a result of a job change and has started going out (and sometimes staying out until 5:ooam.)He says he likes going out and that he does flirt with other girls, he says that he enjoys the attention. He says that it is harmless and that all men do it! I on the other hand do not like going out "clubbing". I prefer going to a local pub for a few drinks and to chat. He also replies to strange girls on his "My Space" which infuriates me. He doesn't even know them so why should he give them the time of day.. to the detrement of our time together. When I tackle him he tells me that I am unreasonable and that all men behave this way...all men flirt with other women and "eye" women up all the time.He constantly comments on how gorgeous/sexy other women look but rarely makes any nice comments about me...unless I ask!
Am I wrong to feel uneasy about this? If he is right that all men are like this then I'm not sure I want to be with one. He has completely destroyed the confedence I had in myself. I feel like I want to fight back but I don't know how!!!! Please help!
If my significant other were to stay out to 5AM clubbing, etc I would be very upset. Same thing for "My Space."
As far as flirting goes, I think that is rather harmless so long as you are getting enough attention at home. Making comments about other women is offensive in my opinion and outright ogling is bad.
So you have plenty to be upset about and a lot of what he is saying is hogwash.
Most men and women will take a look at an attractive person of the opposite sex, but they are casual and not obvious so as to avoid offending their partner.
You need to compromise with him on some issues. Set a limit as to how late he can stay at night. Keep his comments to himself about other women. And "My Space" is out of line.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com