shes not ready???

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
My Girl decided to break things off with me after about two months. She was my first real girlfriend. I'm kind of a quiet person and not the most social at school where I met her. She broke the relationship off over the phone and told me it was because she wasn't ready for a serious relationship (I didn't think it was that serious personally). So about two weeks later I wrote her a letter asking why she left and the reasons I think she left. I asked her whether it was for someone else, I asked her if it was beacuse of a stressful situation she was in. Then I left for vacation for 4 days. When I came back she gave me a letter of response. She insisted that it was nothing I did. She also said she wasn't ready emotionally and that she didn't get tired of me. She said she couldn't drag me along with her own problems(?). She also said it wasn't working for her and that she hopes we can be friends and that she wants to keep it at afriend level only. (I asked for another chance. She also said not to worry she didn't leave me for somoeone else. After that Christams break came for 2 weeks and we didn't talk. When I went back to school the next week. All i've said to her hi and a good job. This is where I write you. Sorry about the long summary but I thinks its nessary to my questions. Could any of the below have to do with her breaking up with me? During our realtionship I brought her little presents everyday and called her on the phone everyday. I didn't talk to her friends much. I may have been annoying calling everyday. Could this be because of my social status with the girls(LOW). Could it be because I didn't talk enouph? I talked to her a lot. Was I too nice? The last think is that I think she may be starting to like somone else. Please if theres any way to get her back PLEASE TELL ME. I'm very confused to whether its hopless or not. Advice
She said it was not working and that it was nothing you did. Her answer was very nice and explained it all.

You still seem to think it was something your did or something you are that caused the problem. My advice is to listen to what she is saying and stop worrying about other reasons.

I don't think any of the reasons you gave make much sense... you were being very nice to her.

She offered to be your friend so take advantage of that and perhaps she will decide someday that she has time for you. So it is not hopeless.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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