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Let your love be like the misty rains, coming softly, but flooding the river. --Malagasy Proverb



I really like my drum teacher, but I don't know if he likes me back



Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
Since I had started band as a percussionist three years late, I have to take private lessons to get up to par. I take from a boy in my church. He's a couple years older than me and goes to the same high school as me. Over the twelve months of taking lessons from him, I've grown to like him - a lot. I love his smile and his personality around others and toward me in our lessons. In drum lessons he really patient with me. He always encourages me and is never pessimistic with the way I play. He's even helped me become the only freshman on the high school drumline in the marching band.
I don't know if I'm being hopeful, but sometimes I wonder if this guy likes me. I heard from my mom who was talking with his mom that guy was going to be so busy with schoolwork that he would only join marching band if I was planning to, and during the marching band season he rarely went over to me to hang out with me. He'd rather hang out with other girls. Also, with other girls in the church he flirts with and teases and has some special ability to make them laugh, but he rarely talks to me unless if it's about drum lessons or problems with band. And lots of the time he rarely looks me in the eye when he's talking to me. With other people he's louder, but he always talks to me in a quieter voice. He's a huge dating machine, so he's constantly asking girls to date, even the ones that are kind of shyer-natured, even those who are too young to date, but he's never jokingly asked me on a date. At church dances he asks as many girls as possible to dance, but he never asks me. It's more like someone pushes me over to him. There was also this one time when I was doing this drumming thing for a huge regional church activity. He was standing outside of the room, and I could've sworn he was taking a couple pictures of me sitting at his drumset holding his sticks. Then there was this one time after this church activity where I was blindfolded and he had to guide me. I called him up asking if he wanted to come see my first concert where I get to play a snare drum part. He told me he was busy, but he told me, "If you ever want someone to guide you while blindfolded, I'm your buy."
These signs have made me wonder if he possibly does like me. I don't know if he is acting this way because he does like me or if someone has already slipped to him. But then again, he has a reputation for always finding out if a girl likes him, and he's a laid back guy, so if someone has said something to him he wouldn't really care. Yet, I am the girl he's been giving drum lessons to, so he might be scared if someone has told him about me liking him.
Based on how I've described his personality, what do you think?




RomanceClass.com Advice
Since he spends so much time with you as a drum teacher, he has probably developed feelings for you.

Maybe he is shy around you and that is why he doesn't flirt with you. You should start to flirt with him and see what happens.

To strengthen you relationship, communicate with hime (sharing information), share feelings with him, and encourage affections (compliments, flirting, etc.)

You may discover that he likes you.

Good luck, George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





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