Missing My Ex need some guidance
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I am a 21 year old male and my ex girlfriend is 20. We went out exclusively for 2.5 years living together for most of the time, we had never broken up. we were so in love but the relationship was clearly on shaky ground for a while..... she broke off the relationship very abruptly about 6 months ago, at first i tried to say that things would be different and that i loved her, she said that loving her wasn't enough anymore, i tried to play it cool out of hopes that she would come back, days later she graduated college and i left her a message simply saying congratulations and that i hope everything worked out, this recieved no response, a few days later i became angry and left a bag full of her clothing by her front door, this recieved no response, a few more days passed and i became more angry and i left her a message saying that if its over its over and that i was done caring and trying to repair our relationship when clearly she had no desire to, in return i recieved a very nasty messsage, i decided not to respond, it is now 6 months later and i have been thinking about her a lot, our would be anniversary is coming up... we have not had any sort of communication with the exception of her recently emailing me simply saying that she wanted something of hers back, i didnt want to fuel the fire by responding with something nasty so i decided to go with the indifferent approach, i waited a few days and told her that i would leave it in her mailbox when i had a chance which i did a few days later, i recieved no acknowledgement, i wish i would have said something along the lines of i will mail it to you, do not email me anymore, i feel like i gave in way too easily, i am a realist and i realize that a response like that may have put the ball back in my court a little, i admit i was a little afraid of making things worse, where do i go from here? calling her up and being nice will only reinforce the hell that she has put me through
Although it may be obvious to you, you never said you loved her (except in the immediate aftermath of the breakup.)
Face it, you have no further relationship with her. You didn't even mention what she said about why she broke up with you. You described the back and forth (very little which was answered) but seem to have been, and possibly still are, in an angry mood with her. This might be the correct stance to take with her but it will never get you back together again.
My advice is to write this off to experience. Make sure you don't make the mistakes again, or recognize the faults in the other person sooner. Communications will help too.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com