My bf's ex is coming back into town-- she might stay at his place

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Hi all,

I am a very jealous person. I actually went to see a counselor at my university, so that has helped me alot. Reading other people's stories here have helped me too. However, I still have this one boyfriend's ex lives in Japan, but she comes out every now and then to visit the U.S.

Recently, she has suggested to my bf's family that she will come out in December. They dated for 2.5 years, but due to the immigration issue and whatnot, she can't stay in the U.S. I think this is one of the main reasons why they broke up in the first place. So, she happens to be closer to his family than I would like. Even though they broke up, she still contacts his family. She told my bf's sister that she might come out here for Christmas. The last time she did, she stayed with him-- and in his bed. This was before he met me though. He was dating a girl at the time, but it wasn't anything serious according to him

My question is: she will need a place to stay...would it be appropriate if she stayed with his family? He lives at home and I'm sure his mom would not object if she stayed in their house. However, I would not like it. I'm sure he would not either because we are in a committed relationship. I wouldn't know how to deal with his family though... please help! Advice
You are in a hard position.

The only logical place for her to stay is at his house. Hopefully not in his bed. That would be too much.

Would it make sense for her to stay at your place while you stay at his place?

I wouldn't put up with her staying at his house if the tables were turned.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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