Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Ok, the situasion I'm in at the moment is insane....
I've sent a couple of question to you guys regarding a relationship I had, which fell to pieces, and all the advice I did take, which in the end (well about a week ago) resulted in me and my ex(we went out for 3 years and were broken up for about 1 year) to get back together.. Now the problem is.
Firstly: The day we got back together I was with her at a club after a gig I had, and she completely fell in love with me all over. She completely gave me the honest truth, telling me she wants to get back together on the spot....
The situasion we had, was: We both had other people after we broke up and also both broke up with those people at similar times while still having contact with them. Now that we're back together I fell that even though I still do love her soo much,I fear of being told that it's not gonna work and losing the other person that still wanted me.
Secondly: Yesterday she phoned me, telling me that she is going to tell her ex that we're back together, by inviting him to her place. I told her it's fine but I felt so uneasy about it, she phoned me later and told me that he understands and all that crap, but still I feel that there is feelings between the two of them.
Thirdly: How can this work if I give my all and do brake all bonds with my ex, and concentrate on this relationship fully, while she is still seeing her ex(she claims as friends) and telling me that she fears commitment.
It's been a year of torment and confusement, my life feels like it's going nowhere, and am I throwing away a potensial relationship with my (now) ex, which is "so" ready to commit completely?
The answer to all of your questions is... you are going to have to make up your mind.
Nobody else can do it for you. My advice is to have a long honest trusting and caring conversation with your former ex. Gently and carefully explain to her that you are worried about how committed she is. Say that you will have to hurt your current ex very badly and you would not want to do that without discussing the situation with your former ex.
Get your life back on the track by thinking very hard about which woman will please you the most in your future.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com