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I just wish i had enough courage

they have this guy i really love he is just so winderful it started last year we would pretend we went with each other always playing always siting together whn we had a substitute the thing is while all of this was going on i didn't really fel that strong about him i mean i liked him but not how i do now then he started going with a friend of mine so we couldn't really act the way we did that's when it started happening i couldn't not think about him for less than a 30 minutes top i mean he is on my mind all the time at night in the morning everywhere i hust could not get him off my mind after they broke up we started acting like that a lil bit more he gave me a hug each and every single day it was so wonderful i wondered what i thought about before he totally consumed all of my thoughts but we were always just friends that's how it stayed i always wish for so much more now we are both in 9th grade we barely talk anymore but we do from time to time he still is in all my thoughts i still love him very deeply it hurts me so much inside sometimes i just have to cry to let it all out cause it so much to handle the weird thing is that it does not bother me to see him when he gets a new girlfriend because i want him to be happy that is just how much i lov him i still get a hug from him every now and a then and it hurts when i see him and he doesn't talk to me when i see him but hey what can i say it's life i am even at this moment trying to hook one of my friends up with him because i believe they like each other so i guess that's how life goes but if it ever comes to him liking me more than a friend i would not know what to do because i would no want our friendship to end because he might all of a sudden not love me anymore and i probably would not be able to handle something like that i just wish i had enough courage to tell this wonderful person how much i love him so maybe i can start concentrating on my schoolwork because he is on my mind all day everyday


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