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I was driving down this street with a bunch of friends
I was driving down this street with a bunch of friends on our girls night out and a car full of guys pulls up next to us. We start to race them down the road. Eventally we all meet at dunkin donuts, introduce each other and hangout. The night after me and a friend run into the same guys at a local pool hall. I also run into my brothers x-girlfriend. A couple days later I got a call from some guy. I called back and it was one of the guys inviting me and my friends to a party he was throwing. He got my number from my brothers x-girlfriend which is one of his good friends. So we went, and this guy followed me around the whole night introducing me to his friends, making sure i was walking straight and everything. They invited us over the next night to just hang out. So we went, and hung out. The guy asked me to go for a walk, so we did. We talked and he held my hand. And at one point he asked me to look at a star, so i stoped and looked up and then he kissed me. We stood there for twenty minutes at least just kissing. He sent me a dozen roses the next week, came and met my parents and they adored him. So we were together for the whole summer and it was perfect. he was so good to me. Then the summer was over and I had to go back to school. We still talked, he would come to every football game and watch me cheerlead, and i would always ignore him cause i had a different interest. Eventually we didnt talk and that is when i realized how much of an idiot i was. He was supposed to be starting the marines soon but i had no idea when. My friend still talked to his friend so we ended up going to his house for new years and of couse he had a girl there, and she was wearing his dog tags. Everythign went fine until the ball dropped. After it dropped he went around and said goodbyes to everyone,(you see he was leaving for the marines in the morning) and i was the last one he came to. I was standing next to the door leanign against a table by myself staring at wall. He walked up to me set my beer on the table, lifted my chin, looked into my eyes and said "i am gonna miss you". I just stared at him. Then he put my arms around him and hugged me. But we wouldnt let go of each other. When he let go he walked away but slid his hand down my arm until he was out of reach. about a hour later when i had enough booze in me to have courage, i decided that i was gonna tell him how i felt i went downstairs and dragged him away from everyone. He asked me what i wanted to say, and i brought up some random conversation but he wouldnt let it happen. He tried to get it out of me for about a hlaf hour then he finally said "I know what you wanna say, i have heard it from everyone else, i just need to hear it from you". I looked at him about to open my mouth and then the girl walked in. He looked at her, then looked at me,sighed got up and walked away with the girl. I sat there for a moment then relized i jsut made the biggest mistake of my life, fell to the floor, and just started sobbing, eventually my friends came down along with all the guys got me off the floor and in the car and took me away. I cried for two days straight, just sitting in my room staring at the wall.
Three months later i was sitting at home watching movie and i got a call from his friend asking me if i was home. Five miniutes after getting the call there was a knock on the door and in he walked with a big grin on his face. So we hung out for a while and then he left. he sent me a few letters just to tell me what he was doing and how he was and for my birthday he sent me a beatuiful ruby necklace. But last letter i didnt know was going to be the last. They just stopped coming.
The next two years really ment nothing. I dated of course but i knew it was pointless cause every guy i just wished it was him. I even dated a lookalike of him. I cried every night because i was so stupid. Eventually i came to the relization that he would never be in my life again. I hated my life, and i was so scared that i would spend my whole life wishing he was there. The football games were hard. I would always look for him not to find him. The only reason i cried at my last cheerleading competition was because he wasnt there. I didnt even go to my senior prom because i wouldnt be able to go with him. Graduation was pretty hard too. But the summers were the worst. I would go to our old places and think he might be there. And i couldnt look at the stars without waiting for his kiss. I thought i was crazy. Then i went to college. I promised myself that it would be different. I didnt want to forget about him i just wanted to move on, and that is what i did, For a while, until i was talking to my friend that just happened to be his old room mate but from what i knew never talked to him. I found out that the guy that i had never forgotten about had gotten married. I didnt know what to do so i went into my room and cried, it took me about a week to get over that.
A year and half later i was back in town for christmas break and i was really happy with my boyfriend who'd i been dating for about a year. I get a call that wakes me up so i answer it and i say hello but the person on the other line said nothing so i hung up and went back to bed. It was a number i didnt know so i didnt really care. Then i check my voicemail and it was him wanting to hang out at a friends house. I dropped my phone and jsut sat there for 20 mintues tyring to figure out what just happened. I eventually called him back and got the details about the party. I immediatly called my friends to see who would go with me. I didnt know what to do, i mean he was married and i was in a realationship, what would be the point of going? But i had to
We showed up and yes it was akward.(at first) Then we kinda just pulled what we used to, picking on each other (no by the way his wife wasnt there). Eventually he got me alone and he was just talking to me and getting really close. He touched my cheak, brushed my hair out of my face looked me in the eye and told me that he missed me, he never stopped thinking about me, he wanted to take care of me now and wanted me to be safe with him, and then he leaned into kiss me. And to my own suprised i backed up and he started to sway a little bit and almost fell down because he was drunk. He asked why i walked away and i couldnt answer him, i didnt even know. Then i remembered that he had a wife. He gave me all the sweet lines again, and i shot back telling him he had someone to take care of already, and that someone else thinks she is safe with him. And then i looked at him, and realized that was all i ever wanted to hear from him, but i couldnt accept it because that isnt how i am.
Eventually i helped him to a couch and he kept asking me to stay with him and to hold him. I told him it wasnt my job. The need for me to stay with him was so strong inside me but i got up kissed him on the forehead, walked to the door turned around to just stare at him one more time and then walked out the door.
I still think about him all the time, i still cry about him, and i will never stop loving him. I still dont know if he ment everything he said, i dont know what would have happened if i kissed him, or even if i stayed. I know though taht i am not going to be a girl that ruins another girls life. I have yet to hear from him, but i think i will. I dont know what will happen, and now i dont know what i want to happen. He is in the one that got away, everythign that i ever wanted and ever will, but i had to let him go again.
songs say that true love always come back to you. And i really do believe that now, but do they only come back once?
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