i still wish itll get better

Me and my ex broke up a few weeks ago, the day we broke up he text me and said i miss you come over, and i didnt wanna reply but i coulndt help myself so i lest my freidns and went over. we cryed together and he still wasnt sure if he wanted me back, we had had a trip planned and a week after we broke up i thought that this trip would make it work, on a yaght for 6 days just the 2 of us and at night he would hold while we slept but thats about it. so i wrote him a letter telling how i felt but even that didnt work. It seemed like in thew beginning of the break up he wanted me back but now that time has passed its like he doesnt. i only hope that time will make this better but im almost starting to think thats its all bullshit. i wanted to marry this guy thats how much i loved him but in all sence it was my fault, he never trusted me and i gave him reason not to a month into out relationship but he forgave but he obviously never forgot. I just hope that we will get backtogether and hell love me like he used to