be honest

My husband cheated on me. I knew he was cheating but he kept denying it. I thought I was going crazy. I searched his computer (lots of emails and facebook communications), put his calling and texting history into excel so I could count how many they had (56 and 211, respectively, over a 2 month period), checked the times of the calls (mostly before or after work when I wasn't there), looked at some videos he took (which included her voice, etc. Basically I was paranoid - for good reason. My husband and I have been married for 16 years and together for 18. I'm not sure if I'll ever forgive him, but at least I know I'm not crazy. You owe it to your partner to tell them the truth (they probably know already) and apologize showing true remorse. After that, you'll have to let them decide. Going to a marriage counselor is a good idea too. Ours has provided some useful exercises. However, I am still so angry that I don't really care to do what the counselor recommends. I've been wanting a divorce since the beginning, but 18 years, 2 kids, 3 dogs, 3 countries, and 5 states is a lot to walk away from.