The Dire Crisis Scenario

Watch a few disaster films sometimes. There is usually a man and woman who are complete strangers - and often who dislike each other initially. But then they go through flames, earthquakes, floods, you name it. And when they get through that incredible nastiness together, they realize that they both are actually rather strong - and that this shared strength is very special in the world. They usually go off together with a strong relationship that they never could possibly have had without that experience.

Yes, the event happened in your life, whatever it was. You can't undo the past. But this event has "tried" you and you have made it through. You are stronger now than you were before. Your partner is still there, offering to be strong beside you. We all have failures in our past. That's part of being a human being. But with you two having weathered this situation together - it means that going forward you have both been tested by the fire - and you survived it still side by side.