Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -
I still love him very much and it's not my fault he was emotionally messed up

he used to date a friend of mine or should i say he used to sleep with a freind of mine till a family member gave my number to him, the whole set up through family bs. well make long story short we dated for one year and my friend along with the rest of my group of girl freinds stopped talking to me bc i betrayed our friend. it was totaly wrong of me to do that but i thought he was the one and did not care if my freind was sleeping with him. well now a year later after so may breaking ups and getting back together it is finally over. he tells me he does not belive i truly love him and that he has issues with his mother and he is just not sure if im the right one for him. its funny because a week before we decided to break up he was talking about giving me a ring and spending the rest of his life with me!!etc....its just wierd, he is just such a crazy individule. he keeps changing his mind, he is so wishy washy. i just dont get it why do guys f around so much? make up your minds, you either want to be w me or not. and that is what i had told him over and over againe, but why drag this on for so long. every time i tryed to move on he would come back in my life again and my silly ass would allow him to do so. why? im usually a very strong girl but for some reason i kept on going back to him. i cant belive im the girl i would make fun of! i used to liston to girl freinds talk about there guy problems and it sounded so silly to me when the girls would not get the picture and see through the guys, but why am i that silly girl now. i know it wasnt ment to be, and its probably better this way but why do i miss him, then hate him, then feel sorry for him all at the same time. why have i become so weak and girly?!!!! why do i still think about him? i know he wasnt right for me. i wanted it to be over but why am i so f---ed up in the head now. what happened to that independant,strong, bad ass girl i used to be. why am i being so weak. why does my chest hurt and why do i feel so empty. how can i let a guy have so much of an effect on me.why do we obsess over stupid things like this even though it was probably the best thing that happened to me. i still love him very much and its not my fault he was emotionaly messed up, and had bad upbringing and such a messed up childhood and parents. why do i have a million thoughts in my head about this subject one day and the next day i could care less. why do i love him and hate him at the same time. why do i still love him so much when i know he is not the one for me. how long will these feelings last. im tired of it. this is the first guy who has done this to me. ive been sad and obssesed with passed relationships but there is just something about this one.


4.14 out of 5 slimes

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