Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -|
We've Grown to be Friends
I started dating a great guy when I was 18 years old, thinking he was "the one". Not too long afterwards, I found out that I was pregnant. The stress and immaturity on both of our parts was just too much to handle. He was unable to connect on a deeper emotional level and scared out of his mind with me being pregnant. I was hoping that he would ask me to marry him and we would start out on the right footing, since we both loved each other very much. Unfortunately, we split up within two years.
Looking back, we were just immature...not knowing how to communicate properly or handle the immediate family matters correctly. It's been ten years now. I married two years after we split up. He married two years ago and he wife left him (he has a child with her as well). He has always been a great Dad to our little boy. He is definitely more responsible and caring since having children, I have noticed.
Our break up was not the nicest and we've fought over so many things during the last ten years that I couldn't even begin to list them all. Lately, however, we have had the opportunity to sit down and just talk about what went wrong on each of our parts back then to add some closure. Back then, he used to tell me that he'd never marry me, etc. and I believed him. Last month, he shared with me that he realized that he needed to do something to make it "right" with me and that right before I split up with him, he was about to propose to me. This really shocked me and made me think of the past. It's a very sad thing when children are involved, but it's worked out okay. We've actually become good friends again and we are both thankful. My husband gets along well with him, but is somewhat jealous right now, thinking there is something extra going on (there isn't) due to the fact that my ex is coming over more often to see his son, or that we are getting along noticeably better than before. I do think that he has some residual feelings for me, but nothing serious.
The truth on my part is...sure, I care about him, but at this point in my life I am just being a friend to him. Frankly, it's a nice change of pace. It's good for the son we share, too, to see us getting along. We have always tried to be cordial to each other anyway. Doing some soul searching, I have realized that I never really dealt with our break-up ten years ago and that I still care about him quite a bit, but on a different level. I would never have predicted ten years ago that I'd be sitting down talking openly with my ex on a casual level. I could never see us as a couple again, even if something were to happen to my current marriage, and I'm sure he shares that view.
Recently, he lost everything he had...his house, his car, his wife and child, his job... and now has discovered that his Dad (the only parent he's ever known) is dying of cancer. I just feel much sadness for him and want to be there for him to talk to. He would do the same for me, I'm sure. So, this is just a tale of my own to let people know that yes, you can be friends with your ex. Yes, people do really change. I'm thankful to have him as a part of my past and today and hope that other people are able to eventually cope with their past and move on as well. Who knows where you'll be ten years from today? Life just may surprise you!!
2.50 out of 5 slimes
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