The green eyed monster I've become us ruining our lives

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Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
hi my name is caz,i have read your columns and i too believe that i have a big and my partner go out often and it always ends up in rows i always get jealous when he talks to other woman recently i hit him over it this is not the first time it has happened i feel so bad i always used to be a nice person but jealousy has taken up a big part of my life i hate the way i act when im out and my boyfriend said hed leave me if this kept up please help i want to go back to being the nice person i was before and not the greeneyed monster ive became its ruining my life.

User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Sobriety cures jealousness

Hi. I just had to respond because I too was just beating myself up for becoming a crazed jealous girlfriend. I actually hit my boyfriend too the other night. I am SO ASHAMED of my behavior. I was never that kind of person. I actually broke up with someone for being like that and now I AM LIKE THAT. Ugh....I really need some help trying to overcome this. I too do not want to lose my boyfriend over something low like that. I found what works is to stay sober for one - that way the mantras really do work. I just take a deeeeep breath and talk myself through everything mentally and after a few minutes, I am good to go. Add a few Jack and Cokes though and I start seeing normal things as flirtacious and I get angry. So for me - it's sobreity for a while because the alternative is triggers something bad.

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