I love him,tried everything,nothing works
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
I've been in love with this guy since over a year now. He's my cuzn,n we meet almost every week. But we hardly talk. when we talk,we tease each other as cuzns,he calls me names n i call him names. well,since first the crush started,i've tried numerous ways of telling him how i feel.
I once told him my friend has a crush on her cuzn,the situation grew a lil awkward tht tym.next I asked him 2 meet me,he said he cudnt come.I texted him askin who m i 2 him,no reply.all in all,i had very embarassing moments! he once asked me 2 meet him,but it was a holiday tht day n i cudnt go out.he never mentioned anything abt it,evr! he used 2 get very jealous whn i talked 2 my guy friends.my teachers used 2 call my best guy friend n me tom n jerry,he started hating tom whn he got 2 knw of it.tht felt realllyyy good :) he evn saved me at colg one day whn i was gonna get suspended n didnt let any1 in d family know any of it.:)
when he didnt talk,i ignored him mny times n started talking again. for some reason last year he didnt wish me on my bday,so i didnt wish him on his,although i was outta town,we ignored each other for months. I once got angry at him 4 not helping me whn i needed help.so completely ignored him.thn d family started noticing we werent talking,so i texted him indicating i got ovr him(i thot the same tht tym)i said something stupid got into me but not any more n asking him 2 accept my apology,so he replied now u think of me?n u shouldnt b apologising as u didnt do anything wrong.
then we sorted out things a bit n now we're back 2 normal. i sincerely tried moving on,but try as i may,i cudnt! whenevr i decide im ovr him,he does something which attracts me towards him allovr again.
I tried distracting myself by finding any other guy,but i soon realised i was looking for some1 with his hair,his style,his character,his eyes,his glasses...i rejected a very nice guy because i didnt wanna move on..but i still tried,n m still trying 2 get ovr him.Hez gonna b at my place 2mrw n i cudnt help but flutter with joy of jus having him around..
my bff doesnt like him coz he lead me on 4 a really long time,n so i told every1 i'm completely over him jus so i dont hear anything bad abt him.one day my other bff asked me wht wud my reply b if he proposed me now,after everything,i told her my answer would be no,hoping with tht i really move on,but i was hoping,and i'm still hoping he jus proposes me.I've stopped tryin ever since we started talkin again,believing tht if we're meant 2 b,we'll b..its been really long n nothings happening..
Is anything ever gonna happen btwn us?how do i make him realise without doing anything embarassing again?does he feel the same abt me?will he ever realise?if not,shud i move on?how do i move on?i jus want us 2 b together..
Moving on from a previous love can be excruciatingly hard, but it sounds like that is what you need to do. I would keep dating others, and give them a good chance to try to win you over. Try to actively stop yourself from comparing everyone to your ex. Realize that will only prolong the pain and keep you from finding future happiness.
And, you are right. If you are meant to be with this guy, then it will happen on its own. Don't try to force things - you could end up making things worse than if time marched on by itself.
In the meantime, throw yourself into other interests in your life. Work on making you happy, being the best you that is possible. Chances are good you will attract a new and different love into your life.
-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com