This may sound pathetic of me, especially since im only 15 but..

Me and my really close friend (we're both in the same group of bestfriends) have always had this chemistry. I fell in love with this guy like not even a month after I met him. Yes, I know love is a big word, but its different everytime right? It was weird, I had never ever felt that way about someone. So about a year and a half ago we knew we kind of had this thing going on, but never made anything out of it.. We did have this one huge like fight about him dating someone while having me on the side and I went to his girlfriend and told her about us. It was very hectic. It kind of felt good though haha So then after that fight we had trouble talking to one another for around a month, then we were becoming like bestfriends after that. But the more we were becoming friends little did we know it would end up turning into a relationship. It was completly surreal to me. It was like a dream. It was like wow, I loved this guy for sooo long and now we're finaly together. He broke the ice for me. He was my first kiss and everything was so perfect. We dance together on this tiny hill in the forest and since it was autumn the leaves reflected orange and red lighting all around us. It was amazing. It just felt natural and it just felt like.. love. So you know, everything was fine and dandy until around 6 days later he comes to my house, we went to the park and kissed and talked. Everything was still perfect. Then he goes home, I get on the computer and BAM. He tells me that we should just stay really good friends because hes scared that if we wait any longer and if we end up breaking up later it would be harder on both of us. I totally agreed on that, but it was just like sooo out of the blue that I felt like I was going to die. I was crying like if someone was murdering me. It was horrible. The next day at school I was crying almost all day, people cared for me and he just didnt. He was acting as though nothing even happened. It just shocked me out of my mind. Anyways, now its 7 months from then. We're becoming very good friends again, so im happy. We're actually going to LaRonde with another friend this summer. I still think about those wonderful 6 days we had together. And I miss him alot sometimes. But I dont think I miss him.. I think I just miss having someone feel that way about me and me feeling that way about someone aswell. Sometimes I want him back but deep down I really dont! If ever he would ask me back I would force myself to say no, just because I wouldnt trust him. My heart is just too sacred for someone who is undesearving.

It just sucks because I feel like I have no closure and that I'll never really get over him and find someone new. I just want to forget about him and not think of him that way. I just want to be friends... Its a suckish situation!

Hello Sillybirds.

I don't think that it is pathetic at all ~ especially at 15.

You had a friend, who became a boyfriend, who, then, out of the blue, said he just wanted to go back to being friends.

This must have been very confusing for you.

However, if this was a year & a half ago, and you are only 15 now, then you were very young to be falling in love and he may have realised this and felt wary.

If you have a close bond, then it may yet develop into something special, and, being a little older, it may feel more right for both of you. Don't give up on trust until you understand him and the situation better.

You are still young, though, so be careful.

And, as you say, sometimes it's a case of being in love with being in love, rather than being in love with a specific person.

Take care

I know you hate hearing that you are too young to have feelings like that, that darn old cliche'. Anyway, I remember being fifteen and I fell in love that year too. Believe it or not, thirty years later, he is still to this day my very best friend. We talk as often as we can, know each other's secrets, etc.

Cheerish the fact that you have him, but just remain friends. It will be so much worth it later in your life when you really meet the man of your dreams!!

Thanks guys so much! I just found it weird because he was the one who said he loved me first, and I didnt tell him (wich I regret) but I was like flipping out inside... It was just such a big rush, It made me feel anxious inside because love is such a big word. But really to be honest, I knew it was wayyy to good to be true.

But I agree with you guys, I just want to stay friends with him. Maybe it would be easier if we'd be older and not in high school.. But like my mom and my friends told me, their are wayyy more guys out there who will love me just as much and who I will too. Sometimes I want a guy, but in a way its like.. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with someone anyways someday so why not just enjoy being young ang single and just have fun and love life.

You have a sensible and positive attitude, so you will be fine.

Take care!