So me and this girl have known each other since high school and never dated or anything but started talking and hanging out more now but I live an hour and a half away from her and she came down to my frat house one weekend and on the 2nd night we were having a party there and she got sick so she’s upstairs sleeping in my room. well i got really drunk and started texting this other girl (i know stupid decision i messed up) well she wakes up in the middle of the night and goes thru my phone and sees the txts that i sent to this girl i never said anything really terrible just like hey sexy you should come over never said i was planning on doing anything with her or anything but she sees this and now cannot really trust me which i completely understand so weve been working towards rebuilding the trust and been hanging out still we always kiss and hold hands everywhere we go she tells me she likes me and wishes she could trust me and she thinks she will one day so I know she cares about me. I said that we should be dating anyways because that way both of us will have a relationship and won’t do anything with anyone else since we both get jealous if someone is trying to take either of us out on a date but she says that she doesn’t want a boyfriend right now which I completely don’t understand and also that she cant date me until she trusts me again which I understand but don’t all together agree with. Also what is kind of sketchy with her well in my opinion she mostly only hangs out with guys but they send her txts sometimes saying they want to have sex with her and other things that I don’t really like other guys saying.. She always yells at them and gets mad when they do that but still also she says that there just friends and she wishes that guys could just be friends with her and not want anything else but idk if I completely believe her that there just friends. She also calls us just friends for right now and I asked her if she was doing what we’re doing with all of her “other friends” and she gets mad and says no so idk if she’s wanting me as just a friend or whats going on with us any advice would be greatly appreciated

Hi & welcome Confused Guy

I'm a bit confused myself.

You really like this girl, yet while she's with you, sleeping, you send 'hey sexy' texts to other girls, making her angry & upset, because she now can't trust you.

She, meanwhile, receives 'have sex with me' texts from other boys & you are not sure that you believe that they are just friends.

You say that this girl cares about you; you kiss and hold hands & she stays at your frat house, but you are also just friends.

It seems, to me, that you need to sort out just exactly what your relationship is. It seems that you are more than just friends, but that one or both of you is / are unable or unwilling to commit to a real relationship.

Whatever the relationship, you need to rebuild the trust. It will be easier to do so, if there are no doubts, or unknowns, which may result in jealousy, etc. Perhaps you should have a serious chat about how things really stand between you.

Getting drunk won't help if you are trying to sort things out and avoid making 'stupid decisions'.

Good luck