Hi im new here. ok I need serious help. I have a huge crush on one of my roomates friends. I am totally lost when it comes to guys. he does things that make me think hes into me ( like staring,and paying me attention) but im not sure bc then at the same time hes never made any kind of move. i recently emailed him as a way to try and see if hed be interested in talking to me outside of parties. im not sure if i did it wrong or if hes just not into me. so guys plz help me lol

One safe way to find out if he is interested is to go places in a group. If he is interested, he will seek you out and talk to you. Group situations make it easier because the pressure is off and you can find out if someone is interested without asking to go out and being turned down. Guys are shy sometimes also. They really fear asking and being told no.

we are always in a group iv only been alone with him once. i feel like he does seek me out, we can be in a house full of people and he always finds me and sits with me or somethin. i was thinkin it could be hes a lil shy and doesnt want it to be weird. but im shy aswell and makin a move on a guy is hard for me even more so in public.

thanks for the reply joandboys

welcome to the forum.guys can be hard to figure out at times.it's hie move,you've open the door for him to get closer to you so wait and see.anything that a male is into he makes time for.if it is only ten mins.don't get pushy or you might turn him off.you forget to tell us your age group witch also has something to do with how someone reacts to situations.lets us know how its going.good luck.

thanks for the help. im 19 and hes 21. I agree if a guy is into something he makes time. I also didnt mention that I will be going to study abroad in a month and will be gone until june. One of my friends said that im prob not on his radar as im leaving, do you think that could also be a factor?

Hi & welcome shy_gal89

I agree with the above comments and, re studying away, it could be that, as he's leaving, he thinks that it would be unwise or unsuitable to start a relationshiop now. Either of you could meet someone else, without really knowing each other very well.
What do you think?
How long will he be away?

Well I am the one leaving and I will be gone for almost 6 months. I know thats a long time and it makes sense if he thinks its pointless to start something now. However, I dont want him to forget about me either. I know hes looking for a serious gf, and I feel like if it doesnt come out before I leave he will just find someone else and I wont get to even know if he likes me at all.

Why don't you just ask him to go out with you somewhere ~ for coffee, to the cinema, bowling, whatever.

You could just say that you will be off, soon, for a few months and, as you get along so well together, you would just like to spend some time with him before you go.

What do you think?

that would make a lot of sense but im really shy. and im worried that hes just not into me and i dont want things to be weird

Could you ask your room-mate to ask him on your behalf?

Or just send an email?

I thought of that bad always got to scared. If I hang with her this weekend I may try and bring it up. By email did you mean to email him and ask him out?

Yes.

Could you do that?

Well i could lol, but I would rather ask my roomate if i were to do anything. I was thinking to ask her if she thought I should go after him, have her pick his brain a lil maybe....thing is Im not sure how to bring it up.

which idea do you like better

Well, I think that the personal approach is better. Things can get mixed up once others get involved.

true...i guess i should give him a tad more credit since he is a really nice guy. i feel like i will never get anywhere with anyone if i dont take a chance but at the same time im really dreading having to do that

Most young people are incredibly shy, when it comes to people they have a crush on ~ not just you!

Good luck

ill keep you posted. i leave feb 10 so i better come up with it soon lol

Yes, keep us posted