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Joined: May 2006
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Carl Offline OP
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Any one care to share how you met and how you got together?


Marge is the love of my life.
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i met my gal in the crowd crush at the end of a rahid taha gig at the womad festival in reading four years ago. instant love at first sight and i haven't looked back since. been having a long distance thing since but last month she moved in with me.

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Carl Offline OP
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Good for you! Rather than look up what it is, what is a rahid taha gig and what is the womad?

Do you complement each other with your interests and talents, or do you share a lot of interests?


Marge is the love of my life.
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We were at separate single-sex grammar schools, but half way through Sixth Form, the education system went comprehensive. We had to transfer to a mixed sixth form college. He was shown some photos of our old school group by some friends and seemed impressed with me. They decided that we were meant for each other and did a spot of matchmaking. That was in 1974.


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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I was wearing five-inch heels and my feet were killing me. I worked in a local law firm and was waiting for my sister in law to finish work at a retail store so that I could grab a ride home with her. This long tall drink of water who also worked at the store offered to drive me home on his break. I accepted and the rest is history. In fact, we will celebrate twenty-six years of history in ten days.

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Carl Offline OP
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I so enjoy stories of romance. To be sure, I'll be sharing how Marge and I got together; but I wanted to read some of yours first.


Marge is the love of my life.
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rahid taha is an algerian rock outfit, and womad stands for world of music and dance, a world music festival. legacy of peter gabriel and his realworld lable.

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She stalked me, I gave in.


Well that's kind of true. She followed me from a bar where I had cause to interact with her on a professional basis, my shift there changed to a neighbouring bar, and lo she appeared there too, and ensured that i again had to interact with her, we had a weekend of frenzied passion, then she went back to her hometown. I stayed in touch over a 5 week period, when she announced that she was coming back and best i find her somewhere to live. That was 10 years ago, 8th wedding anniversary is in december, and our lad starts school next week (5y/o)


"When will my wife understand that the "silent treatment" isnt actually a punishment?"
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I met my husband when he was 7 & I was 9. His father had just died & he came to live with his mom & stepdad. I started "dating" his brother actually when we were 11 years old (if you can call it dating at that age) & then the family moved away. When they came back, husband was 16 & I was 17. I asked him out & we've been together ever since. Got married after a few years of being together & have 3 beautiful children. We'll celebrate our 15 year wedding anniversary in November.


MHA bell tolls to end misunderstanding & discrimination & rings for victory over mental illness.
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Carl Offline OP
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Congrats to Mark and also to MrsJF. Works both ways, doesn't it? That is, someone you've known a long time, and someone you just meet.


Marge is the love of my life.
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Great stories! I also love hearing how people met, Carl. smile

My fiance and I met in his living room when he was in his PJs. His cousin (my good friend) and I were hanging out for the day, and I reluctantly agreed to go to his Aunt's house so I could meet his relatives. My friend kept talking about his cousin and I assumed his cousin was a 12 year old kid. Boy was I shocked when we got there and I saw this handsome guy sitting on the couch. It was love at first sight - even in his PJs. wink There was an instant chemistry just from our handshake, it was unlike anything I have ever experienced - I guess that is why we are still together.

We have been together now for 6 years - I know, a small chunk of time compared to some of you! laugh


i ♥ beebee. ~annie
--------------------
"Adversity does not build character. Adversity reveals character." — Sandy Dahl
"There is no such thing as an ordinary life." — Alexandra Johnson
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Carl Offline OP
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I don't think time matters - except for comparing notes, and looking back. Sometimes you just know.


Marge is the love of my life.
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I've known my missus (I HATE the tirm fiancee, it sounds so tacky) since we were students. She was a friend of my cousin's. We were "just friends" for many years, living in different cities most of the time but occasionally bumping into each other here and there.

One summer, she was working an internship in Brussels, and she decided to come out to London for the weekend, so she gave me a call.

I was in the mood to get out of town for a bit, so I used her visit as a perfect excuse: I rented a car and decided to drive her around the English countryside.

A night at a charming country pub in Dorset proved more romantic than I had imagined, and we've been together ever since.

The following weekend I went out to see her, and we biked around Bruges...it was all very cinematic.

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Carl Offline OP
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Different setting, with my "just friend," but we were married for 21 years.

And the usual things broke it up - my stupidity, our rigidity, and failure to communicate.

Hope you're still having the romantic trips.

Thanks for sharing.


Marge is the love of my life.
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I'll try to make a LONG story short! I met the love of my life 16 years ago. I was recently divorced w/two children, and it was my first bartending job. I think I fell for him instantly, but made him chase some. He was relentless in his pursuit and wore me down.
5 rough years and two more kids later he followed a path of addiction, and I dealt w/many of my own demons. We didn't see or talk to eachother for 8 years.
Our daughter had started asking a lot of questions so I contacted his mother. She didn't know where he was at the time, but promised to let me know if she heard from him. The very next day (not kidding) he called her. He had been clean for a year and finally felt strong enough to face the past. He wanted to know if she ever heard from me or the kids.
After MANY phone conversations, I felt reasonably sure that he really was clean. He came up from California to reconnect with the kids and never left. That was 3 years ago and we just celebrated our one year anniversary last month.
Imagine my dilemma over the question, "How long have you been together?"


"What if you're wrong? What if there's more? What if there's hope you've never dreamed of hoping for?"-Nicole Nordman
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Carl Offline OP
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Good story, MrsKongcrete! Back when my first marriage ended, I used to read the Travis McGee series books. In one book, McGee observed how, when it died for a woman, it was over for good. So many times, she has grieved for a long period of time, and the man doesn't seem to notice, or thinks it doesn't matter. He thinks it's forever no matter what he does. Then he grieves and thinks, "I'll do anything!" But it's usually too late for that woman.

I'm glad you were willing to give him another chance. And I'm glad he took the steps to save himself and his marriage and his family.

My second wife and I became friends, then married, then split up, then got back together - but not in remarriage. Finally, I realized that we could be friends, but were not suited as living partners, and I determined to break my "addiction" of needing someone. And I worked more on me.

A while later, I met Marge.

So I do understand the dilemma.

Thanks for sharing.


Marge is the love of my life.
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And the fact that you worked on you is probably the reason it's so good for you and Marge.
We can not truly love, trust, or believe in another until we love, trust, and believe in ourselves.


"What if you're wrong? What if there's more? What if there's hope you've never dreamed of hoping for?"-Nicole Nordman
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Carl Offline OP
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Very true. Although my head had accepted that no matter how much twlelve step work I had done, my first wife and I were not getting back together, my heart hadn't. I was still doing it for her, or to show her. And the second wife was just too soon. Also the second's family still considered her first husband as still her husband, and there was too much of cliqueishness rather than being part of her family as she was part of mine.

But, I dealt with it, and learned to be a bachelor again. And, as you said, brought a more complete Carl to Marge.


Marge is the love of my life.
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Yes, there's usually the heart issue! Darn things! smile I guess that's why after all those years we still ended up together. I went thru some relationships while we were apart, my head said it's time to move on. Guess my heart just never let go. We are both so much stronger than we were then and have truly learned from our mistakes. (most of them anyways!)Makes it SOOOOO much better this time around!


"What if you're wrong? What if there's more? What if there's hope you've never dreamed of hoping for?"-Nicole Nordman
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i'd stopped dating, and was celebate, for a period of 4 yrs, and was getting a bit set in my ways i think. my daughter in law insisted that i investigate yahoo personals, i did, but with much reluctance.... i had just about chickened out, had called off one planned date in fact, and was about to remove my profile... got a blurb from some guy who ALSO didn't have a pic, i sent him some smart-alec response, he didn't put up with that for one sec... boom, email started coming, fast & furious. i got so tired of trying to get email to sound like the real me, that i finally called the # he'd given me wayyyy early on. he talked like he knew me. he had a greatttt voice. sexy. we talked for about 4 hrs, laughing & having fun, i thought it was about 15 mins on that phone! shocked me when he said could i call back that evening on nite mins, and he told me to look at the clock! a week of phone calls, by the second day i was waiting for 9 to call him, (nite mins again! ) like my life depended on it. finally set a date, coffee shop, with my grown son and his wife as company (and safety! ) walked in, knew him instantly & he knew me! walked right into his arms, felt like i was comin' home. stayed up all that nite, talkin' laughin' listenin' to music, gettin to know more about each other, couldn't let go of the nite, so we finally fell asleep fully dressed cuddled up in his bed, got up, goofed around, went back to my house, he called 5 mins later wanting to see me. told him he could call me and we'd see each other. he says ok, hangs up. my phone rings, he says, okay , i'm here, can we go out? it had been 10 mins mind you, since he'd dropped me off. we went out again, after i had time to shower and change and stuff, and he asked me to live with him that night. i've never been away from him since. its only 10 months tho. not a long time but its good time. we'll be married next summer.


I'm filling my empty nest with feathers. :0)
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Carl Offline OP
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Ten months of living together when you already "know" each other from the very first moment is really quite a long time. Congrats on the upcoming marriage.

Loved the story. Amazingly, there are many similarities to how Marge and I got together. I just realized I have never yet told that story here. I'll have to do it.

I like your guy and the way he romanced you. When you know, you know!


Marge is the love of my life.
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