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#306365 06/30/08 09:55 PM
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Hi its Amy again.
Me and my boyfriend are really close, we really love each other, he knows most things about me. He knows I was sexually abused as a child and that i have physically abusive parents, he knows I have mental illnesses, he knows I have an ED and he knows I used to cut. Now I hadn't cut in at least 3 months but broke down crying on Friday night and in my compulsive hysterical state, stupidly did this big gash on my wrist.
So tomorrow he's going on holiday with his male friends, for three weeks around Europe and tonight I went to see him. I wore a T-Shirt, jeans and a hoodie to cover my wrist and as we were saying bye, and the sleeve slid down and just as I was pushing it back up he saw, and I his eyes went black and widened, and I put my hands around his neck but he forced my wrist in front of him and I said "no." and he left it, and the I went to kiss him, and he just tried to look at it again but then he gave up and kissed me. We were in his car around the corner from my house and I could tell he didn't want to be kissing me but he didn't really know what else to do. He said he loved me but it seemed empty. He was barely kissing back. He drove to my house and we pretended nothing happened, kissed, said goodbye and "I love you" but it didn't seem the same.

Could it be that the moment he saw that cut he stopped loving me...

unknown #306370 06/30/08 10:46 PM
Joined: May 2008
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I used to cut and had an ED as well when I was a teen. I also have a severe mental disorder that has ruined many of relationships for me. I'm divorced now, but the actual father of my children (my best friend) is coming back into my life. I thought I had pushed him away when my disorder started acting up and that he hated me when I stopped eating and losing weight. He told me recently, he didn't hate me, he could never stop loving me, but that he was upset that I didn't think to talk to him and together we work it out.

So no, I don't think the cutting made him stop loving you. He does very much love you, but he's probably hurting for you because he doesn't know what to do. He's probably trying to process it all as well. It's a shock to a person when they see the one they love still hurting and them not having a way to take the pain away. Does that make sense?

He does love you, but is just hurting inside.


unknown #306407 07/01/08 01:40 AM
Joined: Dec 2004
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Unknown, I am rather concerned.

You are posting from the same computer as Parakeet lover and, as with parakeet lover, you are posting a number of different problems.

Is it that you are posting on behalf of a number of friends, or is it that you are simply providing us with 'what if' scenarios?

It could be that you have a number of problems, in which case I strongly suggest that you see a doctor or counsellor for advice and support.

Alternatively, as said, you could be submitting posts for others ~ especially as you have given two names (Amy and Andrew), two ages (16 & 18) and both genders.

Could you clarify, please, whether you are one person with a number of concerns, several people posting under one 'user name' (which we strongly discourage as it causes confusion), or someone just providing us with scenarios to ponder?

Thank you.

And, as I said before, if you do have problems, please see a counsellor or doctor who can help you more than we can ~ immediately. Most of the issues that you have raised are potentially very serious and need urgent expert help.

*

unknown: last night i felt like my brain was drunk... everything was shaky and my mind was spinning and I couldn't find things and I kept forgetting I was in my own house. and now I feel dizzy and just dry.
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...5534#Post305534

unknown: Hi its Amy again. Me and my boyfriend are really close, we really love each other, he knows most things about me. He knows I was sexually abused as a child and that i have physically abusive parents, he knows I have mental illnesses, he knows I have an ED and he knows I used to cut. Now I hadn't cut in at least 3 months but broke down crying on Friday night and in my compulsive hysterical state, stupidly did this big gash on my wrist.
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=306370#Post306370

unknown: I just recently realized I was bisexual about a month ago, ever since I made out with my best friend at a party.
I kept it a secret for about a week, but I decided to tell three of my best friends, one of them being a bisexual herself. They all understood, and were cool with it. Now I have this one very BEST friend, who is a strong Christian (I'm an Atheist, and she knows this), and I waited to tell her because I was pretty sure she would disown me.
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...4815#Post304815

parakeet lover: My name is Andrew and I have one parakeet named Pepper.I'm 18 years old

parakeet lover: yesterday my girlfriend was over and we were making out with her on my lap. Then she stopped and pulled away and got this really weird look on her face. She got off me and realized that she got her period on my leg - not a lot, but just a little red dot. I admit, I was kind of grossed out (because periods gross pretty much all guys out)
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=281245#Post281245

parakeet lover: My best friend wanted to go to her bf's early birthday party. She could only go if i went w/ her. She promised me she wood acknowledge i was there. But........the thing i ended up doing was sitting up in the far corner of the stair well, being the emo girl on the side lines no1 cares about.
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...2571#Post272571

parakeet lover: Hey I'm 16 and I have a slight speech impairment. Nobody knows exactly why I have it, but it may be because I live with Asperger's Syndrome
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...5558#Post275558

parakeet lover: i have a best friend who i trust but at this very moment has me pondering questions through my head ..... he knew how we met and well i had my ex met her on myspace and he never even talked to her unless i was around but all of a sudden with me introducing him to my girlfriend now (he just met her yesturday) he has begun leaving her comments and messaging her and talking about things he never asked anyone i dated
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...5694#Post275694

parakeet lover: So, like I dont know. One of my friends just told me (possibly inadvertently, she does that sometimes) that her dad slaps her sometimes when hes mad.
I dont know. I just dont know what to do, or say
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...4815#Post304815

parakeet lover: So I finally decided to quit smoking pot (even though I barely smoked, I still don't think it was a big deal) because all my friends were xxxxxx and my ex (who I still have feelings for) was upset about it... she asked why her opinion meant so much and I told her because she was important to me. ....I guess I'm just feeling really lost right now. I can't smoke, so I lost the best escape I had. And I just don't know what to do anymore.
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...3963#Post293963

parakeet lover: I really need someone to listen to this. I need to get this out. I'm tired of keeping all of this to myself. I've had enough. This is what I've been dealing with nonstop and I'm tired of not telling anyone: I'm xxxxxxx tired of holding in my feelings everyday and pretending that everything is fine. I'm xxxxxxx tired of people not caring. I'm xxxxxxx tired of people saying that suicide is selfish.
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthread...8225#Post298225


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
PDM #306427 07/01/08 02:29 AM
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Multiple Personality Disorder? I'm not joking I'm serious


Feeling inconstant would drive me insane, Flesh, to blood, to bone my love, twisted...Is It Real?
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True Blue Soulmate
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Possible.
Whatever the reason, if one person really is coping with lots of problems, then counselling would be advisable I think.


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.

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