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Zyger1500 #253102 02/06/08 03:12 AM
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This kind of thing is too big to have secret in a relationship. It's something you need to talk to him about and try to get over. This kind of thing is not something that stays a secret either. Even little things get around, and people you hardly even know may even know what happened by now. It's best to for him to hear it from you, because chances are he'll eventually hear it from somebody else. But he does deserve to know, it's not fair to him if he doesn't. He should also know so that he can re-evaluate his friendship with the other person.

If your honest and up-front with him you can work through things. Perhaps you can even offer to go to counsiling with him. But whatever you do don't play the blame game, take responsibility for what you did wrong.


Missy_Welden #254305 02/09/08 05:44 PM
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I can almost guarantee that your b/f will want the truth from you. Tell him. Why keep it from him? To not hurt him? You have already done that. It's just that he doesn't know you have. And THAT is what's deceitful. Honesty is never the wrong thing to do. And I don't know why anyone would recommend that. This is your b/f's friend. Of course he will find out. If not from either of you two, from someone else whom you least expect. And I can guarantee that one of the first things he will say is, "Why didn't you tell me?" Speaking from personal experience, the LIE will hurt worse than the truth because it's coming from someone he trusts.


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Coroffwife #262168 02/26/08 08:20 PM
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I would say that you need to tell him. If you guys are strong enough then you would be able to make it thru it as a couple. My now huband cheated on me and i on him but we were strong and we worked on our ralationship and made it thru.

missir16 #262298 02/26/08 11:44 PM
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That's a positive and heartening message, missir16 smile


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
PDM #264964 03/02/08 04:31 PM
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This is just what I would do, so take it the way you want.

If my boyfriend cheated on me, I would break up with him, no second chances. However, as ticked off as I would be if I did find out, I would rather know, than stay in a relationship that in which I had been cheated on and never find out.

The thing is, your boyfriend deserves to know. It will undoubtably upset him but it his RIGHT to know, and then decide what to do about it.

And cheating on your boyfriend is an awful thing to do. It is probably the worst mistake in a relationship, and there is NO excuse for it. However, making this mistake does not make you a skank, or a bad person at all. It does make you human. Because like PDM said, all people make mistakes. Making these mistakes make you human. Just learn from mistakes.

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