I agree with PDM it really becomes a roll reversal. Sometimes it must seem as if you can't do anything right. Organizing has been successful but I agree that eliminating some of the things you don't use a great deal will help in the kitchen. You don't have to get rid of them. Just buy three different color price tag dots and go through your tupperware cupboard and other cupboards and put a red dot on the things you use all the time. Green dots on the things you use sometimes and yellow on the infrequent use things. Put the yellow ones in storage tubs and label them and store them in a handy place. Same with cooking utencils. You have your hands full so plan a "help party". Invite a few good friends and serve refreshments after your kitchen is organized. As far as the relationship with your parents goes perhaps sitting down with your mother and asking her if there are any suggestions she might have or things she might change would let her feel in control. I'm betting that not haveing control of her own home or health or her husbands health has left her feeling vulnerable and unuseful. She sounds as if she is used to being in control. Her remark to the therapist sounds like it reveals a need to feel or appear useful even at your expense. Your father sounds like a easy going fella and although stubborn can at least be delt with easier. Don't forget also, that although you are an angel for caring for your parents you also have to care for yourself. Organizing to make it easier on you will not give you the respite you need to refuel and give you and your husband a quality of life break. They have organizations to give caregivers time away. It also gives the parents a change and a chance to appreciate you. Many families in your position have also considered having a livein caregiver whom they subsidize with room and board as well as a small salary. This can also be paid for by parents medical sometimes.You will definitely need help when you have your knee worked on so that you do not over do it. Your parents obviousely recognized your big heart in assuming you would be the one and they were right. Have faith things will improve.



Cookie and Sweetie