Should I continue to do little things to get her to see that i've changed

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I have an ex who we which we broke up nearly 2 years ago. I haveloved her throughout the break up. we have a 3 1/2 yo boy together. i'm 22 she's 20. She tells me she dont love me in the way of wanting to be together. Within the last month we being around each other more than the rest of our seperated time. She continued to tell me her love towards me is just from me fathering our child. From 4-2 week ago I couldnt even get to sit by her, I have within the last 2 weeks been able to get near her and in the last week we have gotten intimate a couple of the days, yet no change in her feelings. She's is obessed about an ex she was with after we both up 2 years ago, she's had other b/f after him too but not really involved with n e of them now as i believe I ve known her since dec 1999 and thought a few times about actually asking her to marry me but haven't. she can't get back with her ex she is obessed with because he lives so far away now and is back with his childrens mother. Should I continue to do little things to get her to see that i ve chanced since our breakup even though she dont want me to? In ways I think that I can convince her I not the person I was when we seperated. Occassionally she dont mind me tring to get her back by tring to be near her and cuddle during a movie we watch together etc. Is there some basic signs to look for that she may be interested in getting back together and/or signs that she don't? Could she be wanting to take it in small steps, or was our intimanticy more like a one night stand? she has my very confused what do I do? Advice
You seem to be doing the right things and she seems to be responding positively.

But it doesn't appear that her feelings for you have changed much. And, she is obsessed with her ex. You have an uphill battle in front of you. Just keep slowly getting closer to her by talking, sharing feelings, and doing things together as much as she will allow.

Maybe you, she, and your son could go out on a family outing such as a walk in the park, or by a river, or even just a long afternoon drive. The little things are important to people.

Make sure you spend plenty of time with your son and she will see that you are a good father. It will also give her some time to herself.

Hope some of this helps! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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