Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Ok, i just needed someone to talk to about this situation and to get it off my chest. ok, here we go. Three years ago my best friend was dating this girl and me and her went way back, like we grew up together and stuff. Well about two years ago they were fighting and what not and broke up, but they were always getting back but continued to fight about stuff. Well one night she told me that she had feelings for me. It blew me away because i always did for her too but never really said nothing because she was dating my friend and i thought she wouldnt feel the same back. So i told her i did too and after that we kinda started hanging out more and stuff but not a lot. Later that year my friend moved away for college and found out about that whole situation and now today we are not friends anymore. Hes come by on holidays and stuff to see whats going on and weve talked about it all and were all cool but we will never be like how we used to be. Well me and her, her name is Amber, kinda fell apart once college started. We go to the same one but once august hit, it just faded away. I didnt talk to her that much that year, 2003-04, and always thought about her and the "what ifs" This past febuary i talked to her and stuff and EVERYTHING came back. Shes been calling me and ive been calling her. She even brought me stuff and i have taken her stuff as well, cokes haha. She just recently broke up with her boyfriend and i would love it if i could have a chance. Problem is not im moving away, about 4 hours away, for college and i dont know what to do!!! For the past two months i cant stop thinking about her. She knows i would do anything for her and pretty much done it already for her but i dont know what to do. A couple of days ago i emailed her and basically poured my heart out. Ive never done anything like that before so i figured it was time to let her know how ive felt. She got it and talked for, literally a min, cause she had to go but she didnt mention anything about the e-mail. I figured she just didnt want to talk about it and i told her we didnt have to in the e-mail. Which leads up to today, she hasnt called me but she has tests coming up and work so i didnt want to bother her and i havent called her because im sure ill panic or something. I love her so much and she knows it and when we talk i want to ask her if we can try something this summer/fall when i move because i know I/we can make it work. Any advice would help. Thanks Advice
You are doing the right thing. You are letting her know how you feel and waiting to see how she responds.

I would not push her too hard on getting a response immediately. But within the next week you should be able to find out how she feels about you. The big problem is that you are going to be four hours away from her. It isn't easy to keep a relationship going over that distance, but it can be done if both persons are committed to it. Phone calls, emails, online chats, occasional visits can help ease the pain of being apart.

Don't let this slide, make sure you are clear on where she stands by next weekend at the latest.

I wish you a lot of luck!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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