Jealous of his Ex

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I wonder if you can help on this issue of jealousy. I'm in a relationship with a gorgeous guy that I met on holiday 4 years ago and we've stayed in touch as friends ever since, now we're together and... we're both jealous!

My jealousy problem started in my last relationship when my boyfriend then lived with his ex! An absolute nightmare as she tried to poison my mind and ruin our relationship. I was quite naive at the time and tried to be cool about their friendship until she made a few innapropriate comments about their old relationship and him and I became filled with fear that he'd dump me for her, or fall back in love with her.

This insecurity has carried over into my new relationship. He's in touch with a girl who I know fancies him and I'm pretty jealous again. I'm not bad looking but I'm so insecure! Do you think i can be cured? Advice
It's always hard, when you've been burned, to really trust a new partner. But just about every human being in the world has been burned and betrayed at some point in their life. We all have to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and get back into the world. So while it's a tough thing to do, it's something that you just have to get through.

I do have lots of help on jealousy here -

make it a task to learn, just like learning how to kick a soccer ball or anything else you do in life.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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