She Broke Up, She Doesn't Know Why

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
My girlfriend and I have recently split- up. She is 15 and I am 16. We had been going out for just over 6 months and this was totally out of the blue. She said that she would rather we were just friends. I asked her why and how she felt, and she said she didn't really know and couldn't explain it, and that she was confused.

I was devastated by this, but agreed that we could just be friends. Now I'm having real difficulty getting over her, I can't stop thinking about every moment that we spent together, and everything we could have done this summer when school had finished, and now i would do anything to have her back.

Do you think that this is a temporary thing that she is feeling, and that there is any chance that we could get back together, and why she is feeling this, or anything that i could do to help her understand her feelings so that we could get back together? Advice
One of the most important things in any relationship is to be as honest and communicative as you can be - so the fact that she knows something is wrong enough to break up with you but can't tell you is really showing that there was some sort of huge disconnect going on. It must have been SOMETHING. Was she getting bored? Was she upset with how you treated her? Was she interested in someone else?

A relationship should always be about people working to fix problems together - and she didn't even give you a chance. She didn't warn you that she was feeling unhappy. She just let it build up until POOF she told you to leave and didn't even tell you why.

I would really stay her friend and try to get her to figure this out and then be honest enough to tell you. This is a CRITICAL skill for her to learn. If she feels unhappy and can't figure out why, it's going to hurt just about anything she does in life.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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