Is she forever gone?

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male

My ex of 2 years has broken the enagement off. Things got bad ever since we got engaged last november. She broke i toff this year march 2nd. I then began to chase her and call and e-mail her over the next few months and she somewhat answered my texts and would e-mail me back. Anyway she said her reason are that she feels different about things and that she has changed. She said we had to many issues in the past and that she is unhappy. She said things got bad when we got engaged. He mom is remarried and so is her dad. I was close to her dad and he was happy for us but her mom was not. She was furious we were together. He mom said i never tried to get to know her is the reason why.

He mom would say things to her to get her to leave me and in return i was taking it out on my ex what her mom was doing. Anyway i was not happy as well but knew it why. So because of her mom upset of us being engaged it upset the whole family. Up until a month ago she would talk to me then she said she wanted to buy me a book to help with the hurting because she is reading it and it helps. She sent me the book i read it and then from that day on she would no longer answer my text or e-mails. Finally she replied to me that she feels if she talks to me she is prolonging my hurting and leading me on and it bad fo rthe both of us. I said ok and that i was going to giver her what she wants.

I then sent her a goodbuy e-mail and have not contacted her in over a month. So it has been almost 4 months apart and 1 month with no contact at all. I love and care fo rher so much and i have went to conseling to get help and i have done other things to improve my self. She know all of this. Anyway i am letting some time pass buy like a little over 2 months of nc and see what happens. If not i plan on e-mailing her in augest to see how she is doing and also she has alot of my thinsg still that she nevr returned. What do i do and what do i say in the e-mail? should i continue to wait after 2 months or what. It seems to me she feels this is best for us to not be together so she is forcing her self to move on. She said she does nor think we will have a happy life together. I want her back in my life. help!!!!!!!!!! Advice
I am sorry you are in this situation.

It is very difficult when your loved one decides they don't love you anymore. It is also problematic when one or more parents are down on you.

Your idea of no contact is a good one. When you write her again, and if she still feels the same way, then it may be the time to ask her to just be friends. You won't get all you want, but at least you will have contact and she may eventually come back.

But, sorry to say, the future looks gloomy.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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