Should i Be Jealous

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
i have met my husband online 1 year ago i lived in canda and he in the uk i have 2 kids but in canada with father. i married my husband in canada and moved here to uk to be with him. he looks at other woman and when i asked him to stop he says he doesnt know if he can calls it people watching. i dont look at other men and dont feel i need to cause if you truly loved someone you wouldnt have to look.
i hate feeling this way and i know i can trust him but my mind wont let me. im always thinking im not good enough. we have been having problems lately not sure if because of my jelousy or because of his stress at work or both, but we stopped having sex all the time like we used to and dont talk as much anymore i feel like were distant. i love him more then anything in the world and so afraid of losing him i get this way so maybe if i fix myself then i wont be jelouse im not sure. Advice
Ask why he calls it "people" watching when he only looks at attractive women.

Start a conversation with him whenever he starts looking at women. It won't be easy to do because you will be upset. But, perhaps with experience, you will be able to distract him.

Remember that this habit of his was a long time in the making and won't be undone easily if ever. I wouldn't be surprised if his father was a "people watcher" too.

Think of "wise-ass" things to say to him when he is looking at a woman.
Such as: "Would you like me to buy her for your Christmas present?"
"Wonder what she looks like nude."
etc. Maybe, just maybe, this will have an effect on him.

Your sex life probably won't improve until you settle this problem. Perhaps you two or just you should see a professional counsellor. Otherwise you could be looking at divorce court.

Please don't think I am not taking you seriously... I've been where you are and it hurts like heck.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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