Should I keep on hoping ?

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Well, we had a wonderful friendship for a year. We became "bestest" friends naturally, we were really amazed by the way we're alike. Same likes, same music, same feelings. Then, we dated for 6 months. He broke up saying he has doubts about his feelings, that he doesn't love me this way anymore. That he doesn't want to hurt me. He also said "God...I love you so." and "You're the only one I feel this way about." It's confusing.

We both cried a lot, hugging each other tightly. And we laughed in between. About our future bf/gf and how they will deal with our friendship. We decided to remain "bestest" friends...

He started having doubts since the New Year's Eve. We had our first fight, it was quiet. He told me he was going to be with his cousin but instead he was at his ex's party. I was hurt because he didn't try to call me, he was just assuming he couldn't join our friends and I. We talked about it, I cried on the phone. And I thought it was ok, I didn't blame him anymore, fights are normal in relationships, aren't they ? But he kept thinking about it. He's so over-sensitive...He couldn't stand the thought that he hurt me.

During our 6 months, we barely saw each other more than 5 hours a week, because of my studies. We didn't talk much about our relationship, we were so afraid to hurt each other.
Now, we still see each other once a week, we have the sms of the day but as friends. He's my first love. We're as close as before. We talk about our love now, and what doubts we had, what we felt...It's such a waste.

I can't help thinking that he'll come back to me, we haven't lived all that was meant for us yet. When I told him, he couldn't say anything but "We don't know what the future holds." He gave me hope saying "If we're going to be together again, then we'll be."

We need each other, we have the same friends, we are going to work together this summer and go on holiday together...Even today, we spend the entire afternoon together, shopping, and when we were going back home, he suggested me to go to the park. We talked about our hopes, our desires about our lovelife. It wasn't even awkward. I'm still madly in love with him. I'm sure we can overcome this...Is my situation hopeless ?

Thanks in avance.
Jelii. Advice
You two are so close together that you will probably re-unite.

Sounds like you have the important aspects of a good relation already. That would be good communications, strong compassion, and great affection (hugs, compliments, etc.)

The hopes for your situation are good. Keep smiling.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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