Please help me - I don' know what to do!!
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Hi. My boyfriend and I split up 5 weeks ago after a year and a half. Above all else he has been my best friend over the past 2 years. I moved in with him and his family 6 months before the split, but it wasn't something we really talked about - it just kinda happened.
Even a month before he broke up with me he was sending me txts like "when do I get to see my girlfiend, I miss you bubbles" and "your boyfriend just wants you to know that he loves you and is thinking of you. You are a cute one and I miss you" (he is always away for work)
Then he went away on a family holiday and when he came back I could tell everything as different. A week later he broke up with me saying he didn't know if he loved me an more and he didn't know if I was the one for him to marry and he needed space etc He is also going through a time of exploring Christianity and finding God for himself
I moved out New Years Day and left him a note on his pillow apologising for all the mistakes I had made and how I still loved him. He txted me thanking me for the letter, apologising for treating me bad saying he hadjust needd space. I didn't reply. He called me the next niht but I was too tired to answer. Then he called 2 days later and I answered and he asked if I'd gotten his msg and calls and then after I asked what he was doing the weekend he said we should meet up for lunch.
To cu a long story short, when we talk he says I should let him go and if its meant to be it will work out one day but when we're together he's always hugging me, kissing me on the head. Last time I saw him we went to an amusement park and kept pulling me into him so he could hug me... I just don't understand!!
I know I should set boundaries but part of me feels like if I make him stop he'll lose all interest and as long as he's showing affection maybe it means he still loves me. He has said he still loves me as a person.
I don't know why he still wants to show me so much affection, but then says he doesn't want me back. I would do ANYTHING to get him back... please please tell me what I should do!!
I'm so confused!!!
His behavior is confusing.
Perhaps he still loves you but needs space to confirm it. Or perhaps when he is physically near you all his loving feelings come out.
Whatever it is, my advice is to go with the flow and let his feelings guide him back to you. See him as often as possible and make it very clear to him that you still love him. Do this without pressuring him, however. Not easy, I know.
Your situation is a lot better than many others so feel good about that.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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