Getting my Guy Back

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I am only 13 years old and i know you are probably gonna read this first sentence and think to your self "Should i really waste time on a 13year old?" but PLEASE LISTEN!

There is this guy that i just broke up with. He broke up with me because

1. I didnt go to his party
2. He's says that i never call him but when i do he's never home
3. He believed other people when they said that i liked another guy when i didnt. I really liked him.

So the day after his party he imed me (im- Instant Messageded me) online saying that i was dumped. He said he was with another gurl... MY BEST FRIEND! He used the excuse (shown above) that i never called him. He said he still liked me.

Anyways can you please help me get him back? Advice
Hey, all of us were 13 at some point! And a breakup is a breakup, no matter what the age.

First, I have to say honestly that this guy was a jerk to you. You NEVER, EVER break up with someone over IM!! That is about as childish as you can get. He was dating you - he should break up with you IN PERSON! You deserve that. And the fact that he already lept into the arms of your best friend shows that he wasn't even serious about you, because when you break up with someone you should always spend a few weeks handling the "rebound" of the breakup. If he already had your best friend lined up and waiting for him, he must have been talking to her and such BEFORE he broke up with you. So he was in essence cheating on you.

The fact that he didn't talk to you in person about these issues - that he never sat down and talked with you about wanting you to call him - again shows that he's pretty immature. The whole point of a relationship is that you share things with your partner, you tell them when something bothers you, you then find ways to solve the problems. He didn't. Instead, he got upset about something silly (one party???), he talked to your BEST FRIEND, decided she was better and then broke up with you on IM.

I really think this guy needs a lot of growing up to do and really isn't ready to be dating anyone at all!! He is thinking about himself solely and not about the relationship. As far as your best friend, I don't think she's a friend at all if she was talking to YOUR guy and taking him when he was still with you.

There are some relationships in life that are meant to teach us a lesson. I think this one was a lesson-teaching relationship, and the lesson is that some guys are just not ready for dating. I would look around you and find another guy you like, who is more mature than that. You deserve someone who will treat you right, not someone who will treat you like a disposable plate.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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