It's a fact of life that all of us have hormones in us - all of us have a natural, human urge to procreate and have sexual intercourse. It's how the human species has survived for thousands of years and it's an urge we should all be extremely grateful for. That urge, and the strong emotions that go with it, are called "lust". It is why we look at an attractive boy or girl and really want to get to know them - even though we know NOTHING about what they are really like as a person, or if they have anything at all in common with us.

Teenagers (and adults too) often get caught up in the "What He/She Looks Like" mentality, fueled strongly by the fashion industry and MTV. It's easy to chase after someone just because their hair is cool or their body is buff. But as much as those lustful reasons might seem great at first, one of the strong lessons that life teaches is that beauty is skin deep, and living with a beautiful-but-poorly-matched person can bring a lot of misery and heartache.

Think of all the "handsome and beautiful" stars that break up, hating each other. Think of all the times that a "pretty girl" has cheated, figuring she deserves better. A relationship that is based on something superficial will fail as soon as the smallest test is made of it, to the bitter unhappiness of both involved.

The best relationship is always based on friendship. Best friends can be happy together no matter what, will stay together, would not betray each other. Best friends truly SEEM beautiful to each other. If your friends care what your partner LOOKS like, they are not being great friends. And if your PARTNER cares what you look like, they are not caring much about you.

We all change as we get older. We all sag, we all wrinkle, we all gain weight, we all get flabby. It's a normal part of life. If you obsess over what you look like, and make that a key factor in your self esteem, you are going to be miserable. However if you take pride in what you ARE, then you will always be satisfied and have something to treasure.

Lust is about wanting someone for their looks, for praising their looks, for treating their looks as something of great importance. Lust fades if the person gains 5 pounds or gets grimy in the garden. And while lust might keep you feeling high on life for a month or two, lust rarely sustains. Lust will have your eyes wandering after a while, to find a new jump-start for your libido.

Quiz: Is This Really Love?

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