Saying Sorry @ RomanceClass -|
you truly are an incredible man
I feel like I need to express a few things and I'm not sure if it is for my own mental health or for yours. Regardless of the reasons here goes if I ramble I apologize in advance You are an amazing guy and I am so happy that I had the chance to get to know you. We both have experiences and issues that shape who we are. Unfortunately mine seem to have destroyed an important relationship that entered my life and left way too quickly. I know that my behavior is to blame for most of the loss. In the short moment of knowing you I found myself strongly connected to a man who I realized (too late) that I never wanted to lose. The impact you have made in my life and the mark you made on my soul will always be remembered both with a smile and with tears of regret. I truly am sorry for everything I did or said that made you decide that you didn't want to know me anymore or have me as a part of your life. I apologize for my stupidity and fear of having a relationship with you, however my biggest regret is that fact that we are no longer connected in anyway outside of the memories that will replay in my mind. I'm not writing this letter in hopes of anything I just wanted you to know that losing the man that you were when we were together is one of the hardest losses I have had to endure. I know that I never wanted you to completely leave my life, especially because of my stupid fear of losing myself, my control and becoming a weak person who needs someone else, my feelings for you scared me because they were so overwhelming at times. You gave my chills. Yet that's exactly what happened I lost you anyway As childish as my behavior may seem to you I need you to know that my actions never fully expressed the truth of my feelings for you and for that I am sorry, I honestly think I was falling in love with you not that it matters now but I hope when all is said and done I can think of you and not feel like I am losing one of my best friends. You touched my heart and I know that I will miss you (I already do). I can't remember ever having felt as connected to someone as quickly and as strongly as I did with you, I opened up parts of myself to you that is rarely seen by anyone I have always been able to keep myself closed off to men but with you from the first moment I knew I wanted to let you in to open up to you. For some reason I felt like I was meant to know you and have you as a part of my life in one way or another even if it was for the short time that I did. I'm not sure if that's why it hurts the way it does but I do know I am sad and lost…at the knowledge of having to say goodbye to you and the fact that I don't get to know you or talk with you any longer. you truly are an incredible man. I only wish you the best. I wont keep bothering you with my rants but I needed to say these things so that I can try to move on in my life in hopes of finding someone who I can connect with and share my life with. Good luck in everything you do. Goodbye.
As always with love,
5.00 out of 5 hearts
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