Long Distance and Internet:
Believe it will work, and it shall.
This isn,t your every-day internet relationship, it,s unique in every way. I,ll explain and give you advice that you can take away with yourself.
We,re a gay couple, but that doesn,t change the fact that we,re in love - I suggest you do read on.
I,ve just turned 17, I live in England whilst my Boyfriend is 18 and lives in California.
How did we meet? - It wasn,t through a dating site, more through a ,get off, website, if you get me ') either way, we started speaking for a while which led up to us speaking on MSN. At first, I didn,t consider making friends with this guy, I thought we would just have ,fun, together which I,ve had experience with in the past. We got to know each other better throughout the week, I was off College for half-term, So we was speaking hours upon hours everyday. I realised that we created a friendship between us, which grew and grew as the week passed. Eventually, we both told each other our feelings towards each other (rushed? maybe, I don,t know) leading up to us going into a relationship.
Before I carry on, i,ll address some issues that I had to question - before I met this person, I thought internet relationships where ,fake, and that people who got into them where living in a ,fantasy,. I also had to consider was this person I,m speaking to the person he has told me he is? We both exchanged pictures, I had a webcam but he didn,t. I had to question why would he want to be in a relationship with me when he lives in California which is the home-land of ,jock,s, fitties etc.,. This led me to being pushy towards him, asking him to phone me - which he did eventually, which I,m pleased he did because we both phoned each other from on then, his american accent drives me insane! I knew he was genuine in the sense that he wasn,t pretending to be someone else, but was his looks the same as the pictures he sent me? This I had to find out, he decided to purchase a webcam but didn,t want to use it until my Birthday to surprise me.
I was looking forward to this, I trusted him so I decided to wait 3 weeks until I could see that person behind the computer. During this, we talked more and more on the phone. The time difference is 8 hours, so when I wake up, I go onto my iPod and chat whilst I get changed to go to College, we spend at least 2-4 hours a day speaking.
However, a week before my birthday he began to get a bruise on his stomach, I forgot to mention that he is diabetic and takes insulin daily, but his body didn,t respond with it. He was given injections to find the reason as to why he was in alot of pain. On the day before my birthday, I got an email from his mother (who I had spoken to on the phone) saying he had been taken to hospital to have surgery to remove his gallbladder which had been causing the bruising and pain. I didn,t think it was much of an issue, and that he would be home within a few days and that i,ll get my birthday present then!
Sadly, the next day he had an MRI scan and blood tests - the results state that he has pancreatic cancer, which is rare in young adults but common in people with diabetes. We have arranged plans to meet in July, i,ll be visiting him and hopefully if all goes well, he will come and visit here.
He is still in hospital and begins treatment soon, but, the current stage his cancer is in suggests he will only live a few years. It pains me and I,ve cried plenty of times, I still question myself whether im living in a fantasy world or not. I have support from friends and family, some people don,t think it,s a real relationship - you just have to ignore them.
If your going into a long distance relationship, the thing you need the most is to trust each other. You need to be talking a few hours every day, be interested in their lives and show that you care. You need to go with the flow and not think about the future, enjoy it while you can. Peace out.
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