Donīt always jump in

Itīs tempting for parents to always jump in to an argument, but this can often reinforce the very fears that began the argument, and deprives the children of working the issue out for themselves.

Often parents will īprotect the weakerī, reinforcing the stronger childīs view that the weaker child is loved more, and giving the weaker child the thought that they can get away with more because they will be rescued. This also prevents the weaker child from building up his own defenses and becoming stronger.

As long as the kids arenīt hurting each other, and are really bothered with what the other has done (and not about some more general situation that is going on), then let the argument run its course. If they are flaring up because of something larger (moving to a new house, for example), sit down and talk with them about the stress, and find ways to make the situation more manageable.