Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -|
Con-Artist / Pathological Lyin
~*~ “Oh What a Tangled Web WE Weave, When FIRST WE PRACTICE TO DECEIVE.” ~*~
PLEASE take a moment to read ENTIRE POST and I am Truly Sorry for being Long Winded...
Don't let him touch your existence; may save Heart-aches! Wish someone (his past) would have been looking out as I am for you! (“NEXT CASUALTY"). We were; "WORK in PROGRESS."
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“ALL his WOUNDS (Emotional, Mentally, Physically) are SELF-INFLICTED”. MERELY SEARCHING for a CARE-TAKER/NURSE-MAID, MOMMY FIGURE, &/or SUGAR-MOMMA.
Life to him is “One Big Amusement Park” without any Personal Responsibility! Wants mate/someone to KEEP HIM CONTENT! When amusement has faded (REAL LIFE); S is FLEETING...WITHOUT EVER looking back at the turmoil that HE HAS CAUSED!
He is an ENDLESS INJURED INDIVIDUAL! In EVERY Friendship-Relationship (COUNTLESS); he LAYS the BLAME on ALL his Ex’s for HIS OWN BAD ACTIONS and BEHAVIORS. NO Personal Responsibility! States; “I was always a Good Husband/Mate.” or “They did or that to me” and “They all left me.” Reality; ALL JUST THE OPPOSITE.
He moves quickly without you realizing it! TRUTH ALWAYS finds away to Escape! Friendship-Relationship begins FANTASTIC-within time the TRUE PERSON EMERGES!
* LIES WILL ALWAYS SURFACE; THEY DO NOT HIDE for LONG! *
These LIES causes NUMEROUS REGRETS! Don’t let the Attractiveness, Believable, Charming Persona astonish you; you will be Disappointed!
~*~ “BEWARE of FALSE PROPHETS Which Come to You in Sheep’s Clothing.” ~*~
He displays MYTHOMANIA (Pathological Lying)-Sociopath which includes SELF-DESTRUCTIVE Behavior-possibly Martyr Complex? AUTHENTIC Guy:
* (Willing to relocate anywhere!)
* Military: Boot Camp Discharge-Medical. (Reality: Injured playing Sports just before camp).
* Education: GED & NO College Degree. (Few Community College credits-Allegedly graduated with Psychology & History degree from U of M).
* Occupations: ALL WANNA-BE'S! Chef (Short Order Cook only), Personal Trainer, Rest. Mgmt., Actor-Model, Musician-Singer, Psychic (Advice/Reader), Song Writer, & SO MANY others. (Postmaster; 13+ years; HE QUIT--persistently allegedly sick!)
* Married 4-times; More? ((Deceived into matrimony; “I Don't Want to Die Alone!” with so-called Health (Cancer ostensibly returned) and swindled into paying for it.))
* Divorce: TOO CHEAP to File and was TOO LAZY to Answer Summons. (Reason: COULDN'T “SPIN MORE LIES” under OATH!)
* Last: SouthWest. (His choice. My mother & I were taken advantage of!)
* Photos (Dating-Sex Sites & Others): At least 10+ years.
He ALWAYS has a MOTIVE & the INTENTIONS behind them are for HIMSELF! Is VERY SKILLFUL of REWORKING HIS LIFE so he can LIVE IN & WITH IT! “POOR ME SYNDROME!”
He declares “Seeker of Knowledge?” (How he is so good at this!) Consequently—Deceive the next target. He believes “Everyone” is out to change him! He is BLISSFUL with HIS LIFE (CHARLATAN or Impostor). Why would he change? Has always worked for him! I now know “Who the REAL Him!”
Chronicles of (alleged) dreadful life was so compelling and by this; he was VERY Manipulative! ALL TALK-NO ACTION! Held me responsible for everything and HE REFUSED TO SEEK Counseling. (TRUTH would have become known!)
Health Problems? COUNTLESS Illnesses...declaring HEART-ATTACKS, STROKES, & CANCER (3 times/over 10 years, remission 2-3 times, & Brain Tumor?) “Died & brought back?” NOW: Year to Live-Bad Heart (Cancer Treatment Radiation).
CONTINUOUSLY sought medical validation for one disease or another (online searching, tampered with Exams/Tests—same ones with numerous doctors & hospitals, making himself frail, and over-medicating using over-counter drugs & prescriptions, etc.) NEVER concerned about the charges or paying them! (Manipulation of Health Care?) Negative; I was there! LIED about Positive Results!
Fable comes to mind: “Boy Who Cried Wolf!” He "THRIVES on ATTENTION; like everyone needs Oxygen to Live." Have speculated (future) when he actually receives a Positive Result (Many illnesses...including the ones that he has already he has/had and in remission?) “MUNCHAUSEN SYNDROME?”
In a Relationship--he doesn’t want to GROW UP; TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for ANYTHING! Wants mate or whomever do everything! ALWAYS MANY EXCUSES! HIS ACTION’S even LIED!
Relationship--for HIMSELF, VERY SELF-ABSORBED! “LOOK-at-ME”! ME…ME…ME! Commitment Issues, ALL for HIM. “Submissive?.” LAZY! (Physically + Emotionally = "SLACKER").
NEEDS CONSTANT ATTENTION! If not; became FURIOUS and threw tantrums, isolated himself whenever he didn't get HIS way, withheld affection & intimacy, became unruly, used derogatory names (in front of others), etc! Days later--Stated; "YOU MADE ME DO IT.”
Exhibited CHILDISH Behaviors and HIGH Maintenance! (Mind games-"Just Kidding” overused). Emotionally, Mentally, and Verbally Abusive. States; he feels “Empathy” although none in Reality! Any apologies; they were ABOUT & FOR HIM!
CONSTANTLY in pursuit of VALIDATION for EVERYTHING; Vicious NEVER ending cycle—24/7! “DEPENDENT PERSONALITY or PETER PAN SYNDROME"? (Never Changing, Never Growing).
ALTHOUGH I Believe. . . He KNOWS WHAT HE WAS DOING is Wrong...
The Deceitfulness, the Actions and Behaviors; he Endures NO REMORSE for the Malicious Behavior! Stated; "It hurts when my Trust was Used and Abused." (Statement used over & over). He likes to REVERSE EVERYTHING!
Even articulated Joking; “History of Con-artistry” (Witnesses-Afterward denied it). I disregarded (for some reason), became aware of the MANY TRUTHS! Petition the court and resume your name, YOU ARE NOT WORTHY OF MINE!
Acquired my French/Native Name-TO MAKE LIE BELIEVABLE! He is not: Cherokee & Mixed/Other in Race. (Caucasian: Dutch-English-Irish. (Hair: Red & Gray).
He BELIEVES he CAN TALK HIS WAY OUT OF ANYTHING to make HIMSELF LOOK Admirable & Worthy! KNOWS MANIPULATION VERY WELL! (Exploiting it throughout life). Relationships are “REVOLVING DOORS” in an historic building!
He YEARNS for EVERYONE to feel "EMPATHY" for HIM and he CAN NOT COPE WITHOUT this ACKNOWLEDGMENT! Ex: Networking. “______ Survivor, In Hospital...(Hurt/Sore), Forgotten, Lonely, Miserable, Neglected, Lethargic/Sick”, Sad or SCORES of OTHER Connotation's.
He is a COWARD; he FINDS FAULT in EVERYONE ELSE so he doesn’t have to look himself! Ex: “You have serious problems, not me”, “You are this…, you are that.” Amusing—My family & friends “You, yeah right—that is so far off the spectrum!”
HISTORY of ABANDONMENT/DESERTION of Obligations! He detests words…TRUTH HURTS!
He CAN WORK and is CAPABLE of maintaining full-time employment! Reality: OWES PAST Child Support ($$$), Evaded Taxes, Banks/Cash Loans, and Medical. (History of Bankruptcy). He QUITS before Government detects Income (Deception?) and/or he becomes SUDDENLY SICK. (Always something-made himself ill. Again--EXCUSES).
LONG LIST of employment, with me-4 in less than 1½ years! Didn’t keep them--used “Not Feeling Good” or Bad Physical Health”, plus others as a justification for QUITTING. (Fabricated information). SO MANY EXCUSES. (S.S. Benefits—Misuses the System?) Held ex's responsible for theft. (Evidence of Cancer, Heart, Stroke, etc).
HIS CAR repossessed--AGAIN; he decided not to work for weeks (Incredible job). Worked 2-months, before that only 4-months at another terrific job (move up), another working for only a few weeks before that and another one, while taking 5-7 weeks up to 5 months DOING NOTHING (Complaining & Whining, Net Porn, Junk Food, Over-medicating, Video Games, Watching TV, etc.). Wanted me to ask my family for assistance, given HIS DOES NOT WANT ANYTHING to do with him (Even his own adult children!)
He explored & registered with LIMITLESS Online Dating/Sexual Meet-up Sites seeking ADMIRATION from Both Genders. He CAN'T COPE WITHOUT IT! Constantly “Goggled” name (even in the same day).
Tribulations escalated rapidly; Domestic call (by me), and two officers escorted "HIM" out of the home! My “Personal Possessions were Damaged (Higher-education was a blow to his ego.), a Physical Assault, & Threats were made!”
BECAME A EASY WAY OUT! KNEW HOW I WOULD REACT-So he could disclose (Next, Next, ...); “She left me while battling Cancer (Surgeries-Treatments) or other Health issues" (again).
He chose to ABANDON his stuff (What little he had) & the Obligations (like HIS PAST—this time; me cleaning up turmoils). Home, debts (credit cards-he had none, used mine), etc. He chose to isolate--Locked bank accounts. (Child support in one account & holiday money in another.) When my son & I relocated; we LEFT HIS POSSESSIONS in the home.
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Predicaments (Was Emotionally Drained!) and this took place:
I BEGAN TO SEE THROUGH HIM & HIS PROPAGANDA (CAUGHT HIM in LIES & immediately he became Defensive and Reversed Blame), ignoring the child-like behavior, making requests stemming from my own Desires, Needs, & Wants (ONLY HIS was SIGNIFICANT! - Disregarded mine like “Yesterday’s Trash”)
He ALWAYS evaded answers by reversing the responsibility and attempts to change the discussion. Nerve to say, “You were never there for me!” Could NEVER back statement up; given he KNOWS the truth! Stated, “Your children continuously like to “One-Up.” Reality it was him that would demonstrate trait!
Caught him corresponding with both genders even AFTER him stating, “Is a form of Cheating & I DON'T and NEVER CHEATED”. “I would never be with a man!” Although; “Bi-Curious?” Was fine in finding yourself but don't put on a sham! Mutual acquaintance said; “He is trying to find which side of the fence he is sitting on.”
SERIOUSLY into Net Porn! Not Ordinary type-NAUSEATING; Ex: Animals. Sexually Lazy-All for Him. (Willing partner-anytime, anywhere. I always had to initiate—lost luster quickly-Again with Excuses!). Utilizes pet names: Honey, Sweetie, etc. “Used them..., don't have to remember…SO MANY of them.”
I felt foolish for allowing myself to be DRAWN INTO his SCHEME (Compulsive Lying); for not being attentive to those MANY Details and that “Gut Feeling”. I DO take some Responsibility in what occurred!
However; what he HAS DONE is IMMORAL. How he Treats and Views People; for HIS OWN Benefit (Womanizer!) He LOVES that ATTENTION; HE CAN NOT GET ENOUGH of IT! Relationship reminded me of: “Forrest Gump” merged with the “Twilight Zone”.
I “Believed in him & Vows (Handfasting)!” I should have listened to many—being a “FAKE, LOSER, & USER”; THEY saw the MANY “Red Flags”. I was so blind! Heartbreaking Phenomenon: If he sought counseling (Essentially Begged!), I would have been there, I truly was “IN LOVE". (BODY, HEART, MIND, & SOUL!) He NEVER WANTED to initiate or obtain counseling! In HIS MIND; it is everyone else with problems!
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“NEGATIVE PEOPLE Make Positive People Sick & MISERY Loves Company.” Believe me; he attempted; although he could not shatter my Spirit & bring me down to HIS Miserable Status!
Post is Personal Account & Opinion. DECEPTION was NEVER ENDING (even afterward)! I am so grateful I saw S for WHOM HE REALLY WAS before it was to late!
Speculating? Are all Narcissistic’s-Pathological Liars and/or Are all Pathological Liars Narcissistic? Are they "Drama Queens"? Connection with Sociopath Behavior? Sound familiar? THANK YOU for YOUR TIME! Have a FANTASTIC Day & Night! Please Be Safe out there! Brightest Blessings to YOU & YOUR LOVED ONES!
~*~ * ~*~ Addendum to Initial Post ~*~ * ~*~
Re-reading and identifying the state of affairs. My Life is is so much Healthier (Non-Toxic!) I can not change the past; however S has NEVER even made any “GENUINE ACTS of CONTRITION” effort to each and everyone the individuals (myself included) that he has afflicted immense anguish on! (So many!) Mind-set has transformed from “I was such a Fool” to “I’VE BEEN WRONGED by HIM!”
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“Part of having a strong sense of self is to be ACCOUNTABLE FOR ONE’S ACTIONS. No matter how much we explore motives or lack of motives, WE ARE WHAT WE DO”.
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