Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -|
I'm over him
He was the guy I leaned on.
He was my joy and everytime I saw him my heart started to job and I got nervous.
I snowboarded a lot and tried to fit into a mold for him. I tried to be that perfect one. When I was younger I didnt understand love. Love was just a way for me to get attention now that i think about it, for the situations when I was younger...
But this guy was different. He made me nervous... he was my everything. I've had been through a lot with my family and constant abuse so he made me feel okay and was comforting. Drugs were all I did and when he came along he changed my whole life.
years went by and I walked around the same places day dreaming and seeing him in my head standing there again.
When we walked in the rain and got soaked, together.... he made me feel so comfortable.
instead of looking at doors at night scared of what is going to happen... strangly he was in my head when bad things happened. When I was younger my dad was very angry and more abusive, when he kicked me on the floor I would think of him and it would hurt a lot less.
It was just the fact he was a comfort and I loved and cared about him.
I stopped eating, smoked and drank a lot after we split up.
I dreamed about it constantly and went back to my old habits. I started doing heroin as a way to get him back because when I did heroin it put me off to a nodd where I can see him again.
it was the same dream everytime
... me and him sitting at the pier looking out at the world
laughing at what they didnt understand and what we only understood about each other...
years went by and now im recovered.
I finally realize ive accepted it and im over it.
I quit heroin and I'm over him.
3.75 out of 5 slimes
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