Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -|
I have myself back
I loved him so much. I was obsessed with him. The first date was great and the second even better. He emailed me love notes. He called me stunning. He tried to kiss me. I had not dated or been with a man since my separation from my husband four months earlier. I felt unlovable and unworthy, and here was a man vying to kiss me, calling me sweety, and wanting to be with me. He took me out. He shared his talents with me. He made me feel pretty. Until, well, he didn't anymore.
He enjoyed his vices, his online women, his exwife who was always there to catch him when he fell and share her strife or cooking to gain his affections again...he became distant from me and made it clear I was not a long-term committment...manipulated me... enjoyed the sex with me immensely. But he could not say I love you. He could not hold my hand. Among our many problems he also would not listen to me just talk without offering advice that was cruel and not at all what I needed, when all I needed was comfort and a listening ear.
To make a very long story short, we were wrong for eachother. For all the chemistry we felt, how cute we looked together, how much my fantasy of a new husband and house was close to reality, and for how miserable and detached from the only affection pool on earth I felt when we broke up, the list of cons was longer than the pros, and the pros told me it is time to leave him and protect and preserve what I have left to offer myself and the world.
So I left him. I felt like an axe had chopped through my umbilical chord and cut me off from blood and nutrients, love, caring, adornment, sex, and any hope of a life of sincere lovingness and happiness ever after. All gone. All destroyed. All for nothing.
But now it is for something. I have my strength back. I have my confidence back. I have my will to live back. I have myself back. Me. Who was the most important person of all from the beginning, throughout the relationship, and until now.
Once you lose yourself and drown in a pool of disheartedness and pain, you are accomplishing nothing and just taking up space.
Dont be that girl. No matter how hard it is to turn away from your baby, your love, the man you want to nurture until the end of time, if it is not nurturing you and he is not nurturing you, then you are just living in a fantasy world honey. Wake up, run away, and start over into a bright, new, colorful, wonderful, fresh, alive world!!!!! You are going to be be okay! You are going to make it after all!!!!!!!!
4.67 out of 5 slimes
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