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Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. 1 Corinthians 8:1



Tales of the Ex @ RomanceClass -
I will never again go back to a guy like my ex

I am beginning to think I have the world's craziest ex-boyfriend.
We started dating in high school when I was 16 and he was 18. It all started because we had a class together, and I felt a mutual attraction. We exchanged numbers, and had a mutual friend, so if we both showed up at the same party, it made sense. We would talk for hours, and got along perfectly.
One night, I got up the courage to tell him how I cared for him, and that I wanted to be more than friends.
(Mind you, he wasn't the most popular/attractive person in the world). He had an internet girlfriend he'd never met, and he told me he'd have to think about it. I, of course, felt terrible. But I was young and naive, so I held out the hopes that he would choose me.
He ended up "choosing" me. But it took him a few days to figure it out. Which should have been my first sign. He was never THAT into me.
We dated for 8 months before he went to an out of state college about 6 hours from our hometown. He was on a water polo scholarship, and that consumed his life. I knew getting involved with someone like that may be a mistake, but he was my first love, and I wanted to be with him.
2 weekends a month I would drive down to see him at his college. Occasionally, his parents would be there as well. He would allow his parents to be terrible to me. His parents, whom never really tried to get to know me as a person, said (TO MY FACE!) "women are just distractions to men, they use sex to get their way and sway men". they also told me i was VERY low on my boyfriend's priority list. All the while, he was sitting right next to me, and never stood up for me.
After he FLUNKED OUT OF COLLEGE, his father and I suspect my ex, blamed him not staying at that college on me. I was a "distraction" and I was "ruining his life". Dispite my better judgement, I stayed with him.
How wrong I was....My ex was 2 years older then me. As I got a job, as a senior in high school (my parents were kind to me and didnt make me work until then) my ex, who was 20 at the time, could barely hold a job. He would always quit or be fired within a month of having a job. Thus, making financial situations tense. We would never go on dates, and usually just end up hanging out at his parent's house. We were having sex at his parent's house, which made me uncomfortable, but any time I would deny his advances, he's become sullen and irritated with my presence.
When we had started dating, I was getting over a serious bout with anorexia. I was beginning to gain a little weight, and I was feeling better about my body.
About 1 year and 1/2 into our relationship, my ex sat me down with serious concerns. He said I was gaining weight, and unless I took it off, he wouldn't be able to have sex with me, because he was so turned off. Mind you, at this time, I was probably 150 lbs, and I am 5'10''. My weight was NEVER out of control, and he was the only person to ever tell me I looked bad.
I, of course, felt horrified and ashamed. I was a little uncomfortable knowing that while he was making love to me, he was disgusted by my body.
I lost about 20 lbs, and he was happy with me again.
About 2 years into our relationship, I was beginning to tire of my ex NEVER keeping jobs, staying in school, and thus, never taking me on dates.
One day, we were in his room, and I noticed his open bank statement lying on the table. We have never had secrets between us, so I looked at it. When I looked, there was a $20 charge to a website, it was a dating website. I asked him about it, and he calmly told me his bank card was stolen and someone must have used it for that.
At the time, I thought "well he wouldn't lie to me, that makes sense". But as a few days passed, I began to question that. WHy would be be so calm about someone stealing money from him?
So, I looked on the website, and searched his name. Sure enough, he had registered for this ADULT ONLY dating website. He was listed as "single and looking for a hottie". He described what he wanted in a potential mate "brunette, short, and skinny waist, with huge boobs"
All of which, I am not.
He not only made a website that said he was single AND looking, he paid for it AND lied to my face about it!
At that point, I told him we were on thin ice, and pretty much on a break. We were still very much together, but I needed to see some effort from him, if I was going to continue this relationship.
By this time, he had been out of work for 6 months. My father owns a small info technology firm, and I convinced him to give my boyfriend a shot as a tech who makes small house calls, to deliver wire and things to the techs on the jobs. He was not on the job 2 weeks before one of the techs admitted to my father that my boyfriend had been using the company vehicles when he wasn't supposed to. My father had a manager fire him, without me knowing. About 20 minutes after he was fired, he called me SOBBING and threatening suicide. I told him to come to my house and we could talk and I could calm him down.
He came over, red-faced and sniffly nosed....so pathetic. I asked him why he got fired, it was a surprise to me as well (after the fact, my father told me he didn't tell me in fear I'd tell my ex and my ex could quit and get severence before he was fired....my dad is a smart cookie!) that was the last straw. I was sick of him ruining everything, and messing with my dad's business was it for me.

We've been broken up for over a year now, and it's fantastic. He went PSYCHOTIC on me...lied to mutual friends, threw my name in the mud. I just realize he's a weak and pathetic person. I have since met and started dating a guy who treats me like a queen. I will never again go back to a guy like my ex. I hope this story has helped anyone out there to recognize, there IS better out there!







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