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Love must be as much a light as a flame. --Henry David Thoreau





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Gain Control Over the Pain
Jealousy really only hurts the jealous person - itīs often a knife that plunges into the personīs emotions, keeping them from being happy. You need to remove the edge from that knife, and while it might still exist, it wonīt have the power to hurt you any more. To do this, you need to make the jealousy less painful. Use other techniques in this area to figure out exactly what really hurts the most about the jealousy situation. Now find somewhere sunny, warm, comforting, safe. Close your eyes and imagine yourself safe and strong. Now, start to think about the trigger event. Imagine exactly what you *would* want to say or do in that situation, with your new strength and power. How would you handle it? What would the ideal resolution be? Build this mental image. If you lose your relaxation, start again, or wait until another time. After a while, if you think about the trigger, it wonīt just be a 'He is EVIL!!!' irrational thought, but a 'Yes, this happened. I have learned SO much and now I know XXXX and YYYY ...' You are stronger and better prepared to deal with your future. You can face it with confidence and strength.

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