I LOVE this person dearly....but yet no passion is left
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
Right now I hae been in a relationship for about 2 years. Me and this guy are now engaged and have been for about 6 months. How I met this guy is when I moved to a new place and starting working and met him through work...and about 2 weeks later we were dating.....he is shy so I had to go through a friend that worked there to tell him....anyway the point is now that I have been tempted by many guys and almost gave into temptation with one....before we were engaged and I thought about dating other guys all the time wondering if I would be happier.. Also I don't have any passion anymore for this guy now....I never want to have sex or be intimate in anyway because I don't feel like it with him.....yet I love this person to death, I don't know what I would do without him, he has been there for me in everyway and so understanding and i would never want to intentionally hurt him...and we do argue alot and we both have anger issues to work through but for some reason I have to remind this guy to pick up after himself every single day...I mean get this I have to remind him to brush his teeth on somedays...I feel like his mother alot, and yet if I don't tell him those things he would never do anything around the house and other personal hygiene neccessities. I just want to feel the spark that we had before but it is no longer there, yet I LOVE this person dearly....but yet no passion is left....and we both are going to the same college next year that means we are going to have to move again and that is fine,,,I just need to know what I should do in order to get the spark back or if its too late and if I should leave the person I love and somehow move on.......?????? please I need help...anything is appericated and by the way I am 21 and he is 23 if that helps you any
User Submitted Advice from a 31-40 year old Female
need the spark
my situation is very similar, except I married this guy. I lost passion for him b/4 we married - and I too, was tempted to find it with other men, but haven't. I also feel like his mother, constantly picking up after him, reminding him to do things, but I love him. We have a child together. He's a terrific father. But I don't know if the spark can be regained. To me, once you lose it, it's gone. I dread the moment that he approaches me for intimacy - and wish that he would just stop asking. Yet, is it fair for us to go on this way too? Don't we deserve to feel the passion again? I'm only 31 years old and feel like I'm still too young to trade in my sex life.
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer