My girl comes home with two hickeys and can't remember how she got them
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
OK i know that you are all busy people but i really need to ask this to people who don't know me or this girl...
We went to elementary school together with me a year ahead of her. She changed to public school before i graduated and we lost touch. Last summer she turns up at my neighbor's house...who is a girl and who went at that time to the same school as her. Anyway from that point on we have continued to become close to one another...she used to be over at my house every Saturday and we would watch tv until like 5 in the morning together. We have become so close that things I am finding out about her are beginning to hurt me. I have found out that soon after she went to the different school she started to smoke, but has stopped now. I have found out from a good friend of mine that she also goes out drinking on occasion with her friends, and while I do not know all that much about who she hangs out with outside of me and my neighbor, i know that not all of them are great people. Anyway, 2 weeks ago my school had our junior prom, and i asked her to it. We went and had a good night. I am thinking now that maybe things are changing between us, and i really want them to because i am completly infatuated with this girl. However, last night she went to a club a bit drunk...she doesnt remember going home but she knows how she got home. She DOES NOT know who gave her 2 massive hickies on her neck...one of them is so bad it is just black and blue. The thing is though, she told me what happened, and answered truthfully (or I hope truthfully because she told me on AIM)the questions i asked about things that she said. I am all crushed inside...my gut is cold. But i am not mad at her because of how she seemed to be feeling after that happened, she said she feels disgusting.But I am still angry, but i think more at the guy who did that to her in the state she was in than at her. Anyway, my question is: should i be feeling so crushed up over this little incident? i know she has done some stupid things in the past because she has TOLD me, but it still eats me up...i want to ask her out as more than a friend, but should i leave these things be or should i press her on them? i have never had a girlfriend but i know i am feeling more for this girl than any other one i have ever known. Any help in sorting out my feelings is helpful.
User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Female
Help her drinking problem
Honestly I think that if anybody gets drunk to the point that they don't remember what happened...That's a No-No and from reading this I think that you deserve so much better. Who knows what she may do when she's drunk...You could have sex with someone and bring you an S.T.D you never know...But if you want it to work out, tell her parents and get her some help with her drinking problem, because that's just not cool at all!!!
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer