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A Love Quote
We don't love qualities, we love persons; sometimes by reason of their defects as well as of their qualities. --Jacques Maritain

4yrs together one day its gone can it be again

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Male
i was my ex 4 yrs. we did alot together an all of our fight were little fights. i aggravated her but i also gave her everything under the moon. we took trips all over. her and her kids never wanted for anything. after a night of me drinking i accused her of cheating an yelled at her saying hurtful things. we broke up but still hung out. i kept pressureing for more an when i didnt get my way we fought hard. she said she had thought about giveing in a couple times but we would fight and she would change her mind. we havent spoke in 20 days on the phone emails only so now i m wondering is she gone for good and should i just stop emailing her alltogether an see if she trys contacting me, i m scared if i stop everything she will forget me she seems very cold hearted right now and that scares me more than anything...

User Submitted Advice from a 41-50 year old Female
Don't act needy

You should take time out and stop contacting her altogether. I know its hard but your chasing her is not going to help, as you are coming across needy and desperate. As the saying goes "let the bird fly...and if it comes back to you it was meant to be". I know its easier said than done, but trust me time is a great healer and it will allow you to think clearly about what you really want. She will soon start wondering why you are not contacting her, and she will contact you. Its human nature that people always go aftyer what they cannot have. Play it cool if she does contact you and act as if you are blissfully happy. Gpo to the gym, buty some new clothes and make sure you look smashing. She will want you back and that is a fact.

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