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Love will not always linger longest - With those who hold it in too clenched a fist. -- Alice Duer Miller

She doesn't want her parents to know

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
2 weeks ago, my girlfriend and I officially started dating

Initially she didn't want people to know, so I respected her decision and didn't tell any of my mates (it was pretty hard consider she lightens up my day, then i have to pretend nothing is going on)

We started hanging out a lot lately...and some of her mates found out about us, but she said she's ok with it now. So i started telling some of my mates and she's ok with that too.

But now there can be a problem, with me being her first bf, she doesn't want to tell her parents about me (and her relationship status). I can understand that, but i want her parents to know eventually. However she said she's willing to lie forever about going out with me. It hurts to know that to be honest, is she ashamed of me or something? I can understand why she doesn't want them to know right now, but she's willing to lie forever? I asked her why and she just said "I dunno, its complicated" and i just dunno what to do...Cuz i really like her, but i don't want to be the mystery person she talks to forever =[

User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Male
It will be ok

It will be ok...trust me. My first girlfriend was that way. We both didn't want anyone to know, but i was more afraid of my parents to know than she was. The reason is that she is imbarrassed to tell her parents about her personal life. That isn't necessarily a bad thing, its just that she isn't comfy with it yet. Give her a month or two and she will get better. You are her first relationship and she doesn't know much about dating. She will loosen up soon and everyone will know. Its ok.

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