A Crush on a Married Woman
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male
I am 23 years old and have never had a real girlfriend, i have had girlfriends in school but I never really had any feelings for them so instead of wasting my time and my "girlfriends" time I would end the relationship in a few weeks. However in school I was madly in love with this girl but she never felt the same way about me and it took me a really long time to get over that.I am not the type of guy to just date anybody, I need to know and like that person first.I fall in love very quickly and always end up getting hurt and I haven't had any girlfriend in the past 5 years, I haven't even kissed a girl in past 5 years. One year ago I became very close to a married woman 6 years older than me. I fell in love with her and I thought that she felt the same way about me. I knew it was wrong but I coudn't control my feelings and now she only wants me as a friend.She is in my social circle and my problem is that I can't seem to forget about her. I really do love her and will do anything for her. I literally can't stop thinking about her and I don't know what to do.We haven't been physical in any way. I don't even wanna look at other women, they don't interest me. Please help.
User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
First of all, is this a recent post? 2008? Does this woman have children? Is she unhappy in her marriage? You made the comment that you knew it was wrong but you coudn't control your feelings and now she only wants to be your friend. How do you know this? Did you ask her out or tell her that you have feelings for her or are you just guessing? I totally understand the situation you are in, but it's hard to give additional advice without knowing a little more detail.
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer