I don't know whats going on....
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
First of all thank you for reading my question/problem. Some how I have a feeling my boyfriend is cheating on me or I don't know... but in his web page... where he meets new people to talk to like myspace, he talks different people and he left it on the other day and me being noisy browsed through and looked at his messages and comments. And well... what I found I didn't like... I guess I feel jelous and heartbreaked. He was sending messages to others saying like for example "Merry Christmas Mi Amor... which means Merry Christmas my love... and he just starts flirting and chatting with other girls leaving cute comments and it also says that he is single and looking for someone on his page and also discribes the type of person he's looking for... It just hurt me so bad when I read those messages and we've been togther for almost 7 months.... and we're engaged.. I don't know what to do.. He doesn't even tell me I'm beautiful or cute comments anymore nor does he tells me that he loves me like he use to ... now days when i tell him that I love him he either says I know... and doesn't really care and or sometimes but rare he actually says I love you back... he dones'nt even treat me like a girlfriend anymore.. but the thing is ... I love him no matter what... and he does to ...I just guess i'm not getting any attention from him. ..can you please advise me or maybe give me hints on what to do or your opinion on my situation.
Thanks so much
User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Talk through it
I was exactly where you were about 7 months ago. My boyfriend and I were together for about four months and had just moved in together and he started flirting with girls online and pretending he was single, holding 'relationships' with them. He assured me that it wasn't because he wanted to be with them or anything just that it was funny how easy they would fall for someone. We worked out a lot of our relationship problems and when I kindly told him how much it bugged me and why (not that I didn't trust him, it didn't make me feel special and made it feel like he was keeping his options open) did he finally quit it. Only later was he able to admit to me that he was afraid of how serious we were getting and that we were fighting so much, and that I didn't give him his space. I still have troulbe trusting him when he's online and giving him his space but we're doing a thousand times better. Talk through it with him, it could be just that he's scared.
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer