Dealing with an Office Crush

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I have a long-standing 4 year crush/infatuation on a co-worker. He's aware of this and it's common knowledge at the office. I wanted a real relationship but he's not interested in dealing with me outside of work. It used to be manageable but recently I've made a fool out of myself and now I want to stop dwelling on him. I'm mad at my brain for thinking about him constantly and mad at myself for being so weak and susceptible to his charm and appeal. This whole thing really rips me up. I can't quit or be reassigned. Is there any strategy I can use that takes into account that I have to see him everyday and yet change the way I feel?

User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Redirect energy

I am familiar with your same situtation. I also have a crush on a guy from work. It's hard to stop thinking about him because you admire the way he looks and talks to you. My situation is that I have a relationship alreay. I've been with this person for 10 years. I am not sure why I am looking at someoneelse like that but I am. So the way I deal with it is to avoid him at work and try to cope with the fact that he doesn't want me. So I'll just fall back and put more energy into my relationship.

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