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Love is saying 'I feel differently' instead of 'You're wrong.'



Am I unreasonable?



We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I am a 21 year old women. Me and my boyfriend(23) have a 2year old son. Recently he has been transfered 1400 km away from where we lived. As I still have to study until the end of the year I can't join him immediately.

I will first finish my degree and then in November I will be moving to join him. We have been talking about marraige and he assured me he loves me and will never leave me, and so I trust him.

The problem is, he sayss he is alone down there, has no friends and so he goes to bars to make friends. He met this women, she is older and married. But she phones him several times a day and when he does not answer or call him back she asks questions like if he is mad at her, ect. And if he does not want to go out and drink with her she is mad at him.

I feel it is inappropriate for a married women to act this way towards any man except her husband. It is like she is acting like my boyfriend is her boyfriend. And I also think that a man with a serious girlfriend has any business going out with other women, cause that just says he wants female attention. I told him how I feel and he said she is just a friend. And it does not matter if she is just a friend, it is inappropraite.

How can I make him understand, or am I unreosonable?




User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Same predicament


I am sort of in the same perdicament your in. But the man I'm with is in the same house as me. I do feel that your not being intierly unreasonable, But I my self am working on jealousy issues. Ask your man does he find this woman who seem's to be infatuatted with him does he find her appealing, In other words does it bother him that she is married but still get's upset when he doesnt go drink with her. And if he's willing and your willing maybe when you go to be with him you can meet her but also have her husband join.

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