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Love feels no burden, regards not labors, strives toward more than it attains, argues not of impossibility, since it believes that it may and can do all things.--Thomas Kempis

Dating an older guy

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I met this guy at co-ed volleyball. We hit it off right from the get-go. I asked my ex's aunt (I suppose that'd be a whole other topic, eh? :) ) how old he is, and her gues was as good as mine: somewhere in his mid-20's. I am 18 years old, and am accustomed to dating older guys because the "crowd I run with" is mostly 20-somethings. And so I saw no harm in flirting with this guy, and getting to know him better. The more I got to know him, the more I realized how much we have in common; everything from books to music to movies... everything, really. Come to find out, though, he is 39 years old. I realize that this relationship, or potential relationship, is completely politically incorrect, what I am wondering is if it is also morally wrong to date a guy that is as old as one's father. As I had said, I am 18, but got all of the partying and whatnot out of my system years ago. I am going to college in the fall, and am already close to being a liscenced medical transcriptionist. I am ready to marry and start a family, and I know that he is as well. To be honest, I'm expecting an answer that says something like "find someone your own age," so let me just say that I have very little in common with guys my own age, and generally don't want the same things. And so, I guess the point of this question is:
Is it wrong for me to date a man 20 years older than I?

User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
keep happiness

Where do I start? My situation is the same. I'm 21 years old and when I first turned 19, the girls and I headed out to the bars. I met this wonderful bartender but time went on and nothing happened. After 3 years of not seening him. I returned to the bars of course I was single. I met my bartender again and he still remembered me!I was dancing when he offered my a drink. We have been together ever since. Still i'm 21 years old and he's 40 years old. I found my soulmate but I sure my parents will disapprove! At first I found myself pushing away, because of the age diffrence. But I come to realize that nothing should take away your happiness. Not even a NUMBER###.

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